Chapter Sixteen
Lowri looked at the cottage with dismay all over her face, as if searching for something more, and Cullen’s pride withered. His home, Kildara, was modest compared to her home at Fellscarp. It was no high tower house with fortified walls. It comprised a long, low cottage with aged thatch for a roof, a small outbuilding that served as a stable for the horses and other livestock, and another tiny cottage nearby that housed his tenants. It served Cullen’s needs, for he was seldom there and did not require much comfort. Lowri, being a lass, would expect more.
He had to put his shoulder to the door to get it open, for it always stuck in wet weather. Lowri followed him in. The dreary day fed a dim light inside, which he was grateful for, because it hid the shortcomings of the place - just one room, which housed the kitchen, with a few chairs set before the fireplace, and a platform raised at one end with steps leading up to what served as a bedroom. Lowri glanced at the bed, met his eye and looked away.
‘Worried I’ll throw you onto my bed and ravish you?’ he spat.
She turned and looked out of the window. Cullen paced, trying to think of something else to say. This lass was his now, so he had to at least speak to her. But his second attempt at conversation just spewed out more bitterness. ‘I suppose this is far poorer than you are used to.’
‘I’ve slept in the open in all weathers, so I think I can endure this.’
‘But not me?’ he thought. His bruised pride sat like a stone in his chest. Cullen could not get past it and was not sure he even wanted to. Why take this lass to bed, why be gentle and coax her into arousal, to join his body to hers in passion, just to have it thrown back in his face?
‘So you live here alone? No woman, you haven’t told me about,’ she said.
‘Does it look like I have a woman here?’ he replied, sweeping his hand around the cottage, which was painfully bare of anything but the essentials.
Lowri shuddered. ‘It’s so lonely and remote here.’
‘That’s how I like it. And there is a neighbour close by. Cross over the burn out there, follow the path, and you will find a cottage. I have friends there, Gormal and Connie.’
How he wished he could go there now, sit before their hearth and eat supper with friendly faces. But he could not abandon his new bride, prickly though she may be. And a hopeless part of him wanted to take her to bed and bring forth that warm, passionate lass he’d taken with gentle longing but one night ago. She’d felt beautiful underneath him, belly to belly.
‘My neighbours are poor and scrape a living off a small piece of land nearby with one cow, some chickens, goats and a few pigs to keep them going. Since I took this place on, they have become friends.’
‘Took it on?’
‘Aye. I won it at cards.’
‘Are you sure you didn’t steal it?’ said Lowri, with a sneer curling her lip.
Cullen reined in his temper. ‘I will ask Connie to visit, if you like.’
‘No need. I can shift for myself.’
‘Good, then light the fire, and I will get water from the well for you to wash.’
‘I’ll not spruce myself up for your pleasure.’
‘I’m not asking you to, and I doubt you could give me pleasure spruced up or otherwise.’
Lowri winced, and Cullen regretted his cruelty. He lifted a cloth laid upon the table. ‘Connie must have seen the Alainn come into shore. Bless her heart. Look, she has brought over bread and cheese and honey, and a jug of ale, so we don’t go hungry.’
‘She sounds like a treasure, this Connie.’
Was there a hint of jealousy to that? ‘Oh, she is. I think the world of her,’ he replied. ‘Now, light the fire, and we can eat.’
Lowri turned her back on him and seemed frozen by her misery, so Cullen set about lighting the fire himself. Eventually, she turned around and watched him. Every now and then, when he looked up at her, she clutched her arms tight like a shield and frowned. It was clear that she couldn’t bear to be near him. She swayed on her feet a little, tired to her bones.
‘Come and get some food in your belly and warm yourself,’ he said, scraping two chairs over to the little table and beckoning her. She stared at him, wide-eyed, as he retrieved a bottle of brandy from where he had hidden it under the bed. ‘Gormal, my neighbour, keeps an eye on this place when I am on my travels, and he is partial to a nip, so I keep it out of sight,’ he explained.‘You can either stand there sulking or join me in a drink, lass, your choice.’
Lowri sat down opposite him at the table and took a swig from the bottle. She tore off a hunk of bread, and they ate in silence, which allowed Cullen to take a good look at her. Her hair was a matted tangle, her pitiful borrowed dress was too thin for the season and clung to her skin with damp. It was already almost a rag and streaked with mud.
Whenever they clashed with his, her lovely brown eyes were dull with exhaustion, and her cheeks as pale as milk. He reached over and put a hand on her arm. ‘Listen to me, Lowri. We can hurl insults at each other all night, or keep this silence, but it won’t get us any closer to going our separate ways. You do want to be free of me, return home and get your friends released, don’t you?’
‘Aye.’
‘So we must at least get on and cease sniping at each other.’
