‘With hindsight it probably wasn’t the best choice of song.’
She expects her sister to laugh but instead Harper reaches for her hand and squeezes it.
‘I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have pushed you like that. I really did think it might help, but seeing you up there on your own like that … I saw how much pain you’re still in. Since the start of the trip I’ve been wanting to cheer you up and make things better. But you’re right, it’s not fair of me to just try to brush that pain away.’
Tilly squeezes her sister’s hand back.
‘Thank you. I do appreciate you wanting to help. But I don’t need you feeling like you always have to look after me, or cheer me up or push me to move on. I just need you to be with me.’
Harper nods, swallowing hard.
‘OK.’
They sit in silence, the sea breeze brushing against their faces.
‘Joe would have loved it here,’ says Harper.
‘He would.’
They stay like that for a while, not talking, just side by side, watching the sea. Then Tilly glances back towards the bar, catching a glimmer of light from the disco ball. Viewed from a distance on the dark beach, the bar looks inviting, lit up and buzzing with noise and light and laughter.
‘Let’s go back for a bit.’
‘Are you sure? I’d be fine to go back to our room and get an early night.’
But Tilly is already standing up, brushing the sand from her dress and reaching her hand down to haul Harper up.
‘Come on, I think we need another go.’
‘Seriously?’
‘Seriously. But I’m not doing it on my own this time.’
When Tilly takes to the stage again it’s with Harper at her side. As the intro to their song plays they spot a group of women in their fifties in matching sarongs leaping up from their table.
‘We’re family too!’ they shout as the opening riff of Sister Sledge’s ‘We Are Family’ begins to play and Tilly and Harper sing along loudly, grinning at each other.
‘Then come up here!’ calls Harper, beckoning the women to join them on the stage.
There’s hardly space for them all but they jostle and dance together, singing their lungs out.
Up there on the stage beneath the glowing lanterns and glittering disco ball, Tilly thinks back to the tears she shed on the beach. Crying like that had emptied her out completely. But maybe she needed to feel empty so that this moment could fill her right back up again.
14
The resort’s library is a cool, round room with curved bookcases and doors that open on to decking that leads down to the beach. The floor is lined with straw rugs and there are a number of comfortable-looking chairs and beanbags.
Tilly has the room to herself. Harper was still snoring, glitter smeared over her cheek and pillow, when Tilly snuck out of their hotel room. Perhaps it was from the emotion of the night before, or maybe it’s just the hangover, but she woke starving and made her way through as much of the breakfast menu as she could manage. A bright purple smoothie, Balinese banana pancakes made with cinnamon and coconut and drizzled in a gooey brown sugar sauce and lashings of coconut and, to finish, a bowl of juicy pomelo and sweet, creamy papaya and mangosteen, staining her fingertips with its red juice.
In the library she settles on a low white armchair facing the ocean and opensBeach Readon her lap. She read a few pages on the plane but hasn’t managed much more. If she’s honest with herself, she hasn’t really given it much of a chance, still feeling hung up on the irony of Joe giving her a book that promises a happy ending. But she opens the pages of the book, determined to be more open-minded this time.
‘OK, let’s give this another go …’
Several hours later, she is jolted from the book by the sound of her sister’s voice.
‘God, I had about three too many coconut daiquiris last night,’ Harper groans as she sinks down on to a beanbag beside her sister, leaning her head back and closing her eyes.
Tilly looks up from her book, realizing that she is almost halfway through.
