There’s something about it that intrigues her, though. When she set out this morning to join the Tired Mums Club she had hoped to find a sense of community, but she left the café feeling more alone than ever. She misses Emma and Leonie and the buzz of her job at the newspaper. They’d replied late last night, apologising for being out of touch, but hadn’t told her more about the story they must be working on, and Kate had the sense of being on the outside, not right in the middle with them where she used to be.
She misses the people she swam with every morning at the lido too, even if she didn’t know all their names. Most of all, Kate misses Rosemary. Her old friend wouldn’t expect Kate to explain all the complex feelings that have been crowding her brain recently, jostling about for space. She’d just swim with her, then suggest they share a slice of cake together in the café afterwards.
The Farleigh-on-Avon River Swimming, Bathing and Recreational Water-Based Activities Club sounds intimidatingly official. Nothing like the casual, friendly swims she used to share with Rosemary and her other swimming friends. And besides, the grizzling coming from inside the carrier on her chest is a stark reminder of all her responsibilities. She couldn’t join a swimming club when Rosie is so reliant on her.
But she takes a photo of the sign anyway.
As she’s about to put her phone away, it buzzes with a new notification in the Mathews Girls group chat.
Erin:How was the Tired Mums Club, Kate? Hope you made some new friends! Xx
There’s still no response from her mum. It’s not like her tonot reply, but she hardly blames her. Kate has definitely become increasingly active in their group recently, sending endless photos of Rosie and baby-related questions, often when she’s nap-trapped on the sofa and her friends are busy working so she doesn’t have anyone else to talk to. She wouldn’t blame her mum if she’d decided to mute the group for a while, just to take a breather. God, are even her own family becoming sick of her? No wonder she didn’t fit in with the mum and baby group.
She can sense the eagerness in her sister’s message – and maybe, behind it, the hope that in Kate making some new friends she might stop relying so heavily on her family.
Everyone was really nice and welcoming,she types back.Thanks for persuading me to go! Xx
It isn’t technically a lie. The other mumswerenice. Kate just didn’t feel as though she belonged.
CHAPTER 13
The pounding in Phoebe’s head has eased to a background ache and she feels more awake than she has in a long time, as if the water has given her a jolt of caffeine.
‘I can see why you come here,’ she says to the other women as they drift downstream together, leaves and petals floating on the surface of the water alongside them. ‘This is fantastic.’ From their position in the water, Phoebe can see the riverbank up close, spotting the violets and wild garlic dotted about in the tangle of brambles. Reeds and puffs of cow parsley wave slightly back and forth in the breeze.
‘I think I might be addicted,’ says Sandra as she rolls onto her back for a moment and floats, head tilted towards the sky.
‘I can think of worse addictions.’
At first, the water had felt bitingly cold, despite the warmth in the morning sun. But after a few vigorous strokes of breaststroke, she had got used to the temperature, her breathing returning to normal and her body relaxing. It appears to havehad the same effect on the other women too. Even Hester, who had been so tense and shy on dry land, seems softer, the frown slipping away from her face.
Phoebe follows Sandra’s lead and twists onto her back, the four of them floating and looking up at the trees.
Phoebe can spot patches of blue sky and white clouds through gaps in the leaves.
‘Is it just me, or does that cloud look like a penis?’ she says suddenly, breaking the silence and making the other women laugh.
‘Hey, I was just thinking it looked like a cute rabbit,’ says Jazz. ‘You’ve ruined it for me now!’
What would Max think if she could see her now? Not just having skipped her usual morning paperwork but swimming and laughing in a river with strangers. Not that she wants to think about Max right now.
A loud noise from upstream makes the women turn to look behind them.Thwack. Swoosh. Thwack. Swoosh. The sound grows louder and, as it does, the stillness of the river is disturbed, ripples spreading in all directions. Birds scatter from the surrounding trees in a flurry of feathers.
‘Quick, swim to the side!’ shouts Sandra.
A narrow rowing boat appears around the corner, a bent figure facing the other direction, muscled arms firmly pulling the oars. The rower lets out grunts of exertion as the boat zips along the water, heading straight towards them. Panicked, Phoebe does her best to manoeuvre herself out of the way, but it’s been years since she last swam and she feels as though her arms are dragging through honey.
‘Hey!’ cries the lifeguard, standing up from her chair and blowing her whistle. ‘Swimmers in the water!’
The rower twists to look over his shoulder, his eyebrows rising in surprise. By now, Sandra and the others have made it over towards the reeds and out of the way, but Phoebe is still directly in the path of the boat. ‘Watch out!’ the rower shouts back in a deep, slightly accented voice, digging the oars down into the water and sending droplets everywhere.
‘Shit!’ She is trying to swim but barely getting anywhere, the current that she’d hardly noticed before now pushing her backwards. ‘I’m not moving! Why am I not moving?’ She kicks harder.
‘Here, take my hand,’ shouts Sandra, who has grabbed hold of a tree branch to anchor herself and is reaching out her arm. Phoebe grabs her hand and is pulled out of the way just in time.
The boat slows, spray erupting in the air.
‘You need to be more careful!’ says the lifeguard crossly. ‘This is a well-known swimming spot. Rowers and kayakers are welcome, but you must be careful, there could have been a serious accident.’
