“You know what hurts the most?” Daegel taps the middle of his naked chest where his heart lies. “Your assumptions. You assume that because my father asked me to enter the trials, I don’t have the will. You assume that because Caligos have chosen to back me up, I don’t have a backbone. You assume that I do all this to aid someone else instead of maybe, just maybe, using whatever resources I have to become the Ezkai General so I can decide what the future of my people looks like. Have you even stopped to consider that?”
I press my lips into a thin line. Immediately, a thick fog of guilt settles in my chest. Daegel is right. I have not stopped to think about it. From the very first moment, I assumed the worst about him. Never once did I consider if he may be using Caligos to get what he wants.
I meet his gaze. “Tell me, then, what do you want from this, Daegel?”
He takes a sip of his tea.
I shake my head. “Nothing? As an Ezkai General, you wouldn’t have enough power to stop Caligos. Many Ezkai Generals have tried. If they put you on the throne, they’ll own you.”
“When did you become an expert on Caligos?”
The sarcasm in his voice is like a sharp whip. But I don’t let it show. I keep my breathing steady, my temper in check.
“What did Vera D’Argent offer you?” Daegel asks. “What did the General’s whore offer you that I couldn’t?”
There’s pain in his voice. Pain in his eyes as he waits for me to answer.
“She offered me a clear, clean path to claiming what I’m owed,” I say.
Daegel’s out of his seat in a blink of an eye. He falls to his knees in front of me and cups my cheeks in his large palms. The scent of him envelops me like a comforting blanket.
“You have my whole heart. My whole soul,” he says. I can’t bring myself to look him in the eye. But he forces me. There’s pleading in his gaze that would send me to my knees if I wasn’t sitting. “I would move mountains for you. I would level cities to the ground in your name. I would burn Wetra to ash, so King Francis would not have any place to hide. I would rip his heart out with my bare hands and deliver it to you in a golden box. Only if you let me.”
The sight of him blurs. I blink. Tears roll down my cheeks. My chin quivers. I bite the inside of my cheek. I can tell Daegel means everything he says. I have no doubt about it. But while all these promises are grand, and beautiful…it’s not what I need.
I cup his cheek. “King Francis owes me a blood debt, and only I can claim it. I don’t want you claiming vengeance for me. And I don’t want anyone else to suffer in the process. It’s my path to walk.” I bring my forehead to his. “I wish you could understand that.”
“It doesn’t have to be this way.”
I sigh and pull away.
“Phoenix, my love, be my Taaslord. Stand by me, rule with me, and I’ll get the whole world, all three races, to bow at your feet,” he whispers, desperately.
“Did you hire Jax Kregger to force me to drop out of the trials?” My words are a whisper, too. Daegel flinches as if I slapped him. Well, that’s my answer. “Did you hire the assassin that tried to kill me the other night, to scare me out of participation?”
At the second question Daegel frowns. He shakes his head. “No, Phoenix. I would never risk your life. Who was the assassin? Where are they now?”
“Dead,” I say, and clear my throat. I push his hands away from my face, wipe the tears from my face with the back of my hand, and rise to my feet. “I need to go. Vera will notice I’m missing.”
Daegel remains kneeling, his shoulder slumped.
Over my shoulder I say, “Vera only agreed to support me if I cut all my ties to Caligos, to you. I agreed to her condition.”
Just as I’m about to close the glass door leading to the back gardens behind me, Daegel’s words reach me: “I have killed to protect you, to protect our future together. I will not give up now, even if your current words and actions hurt me. I’ll stop at nothing to protect our future together again, Phoenix. I hope you know that.”
Unease curls at the base of my spine as I leave him there, still kneeling.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
PHOENIX
I return to Vera’s studio before anyone else is awake. With an aching heart, I slip back into my bed and bury myself under the blankets.
I lay on my side, staring at the snowy mountaintops in the distance through the window. The first rays of sun are painting the sky orange and pink, softly illuminating my bedroom.
I’m so shaken by the conversation with Daegel, I can’t fall back asleep even though I’m tired. The Black Night demanded more energy from me than I expected, and all this fighting and heartache is not aiding that.
When I came to Ekios and joined the Ezkai Academy, all I wanted was to become powerful enough to face King Francis and find a way to end his reign. Or ruin his legacy completely. I craved justice for my family’s death’s. For King Francis’s betrayal.
