But now…I’ve lost the last connecting piece. They’re gone, truly gone for good.
After that conversation with Daegel, I’ve kept my thoughts to myself. We haven’t spoken much these days—Daegel seems to be lost in thought.
Even now, as we sit next to each other in the carriage that’s taking us to Halvarra Mountain, looming over Jaakii, where the funeral ceremony will conclude, Daegel’s distracted. He holds my hand in his lap, our fingers weaved together. Absentmindedly, he traces circles with his thumb while gazing through the window.
Physically, we’re close, but it feels like we’re far away from each other. Last time I’ve felt this distance between us was when he hid his ties with Caligos.
It’s been a while.
My stomach’s uneasy. But I try to keep my head straight. That night I opened up to him, he held me close to him all night. I don’t remember the last time I slept that well.
Just because he’s distant and distracted, it doesn’t mean there’s an issue withus. He’s allowed to grieve the loss of his General, too.
Through the window, we pass the streets of Jaakii, full of crowds all dressed in white. All the windows are shut, and not a single business is open. Harsh wind tears through the many white flags attached to every single building in the city.
White is the color of mourning.
Even House Dzuni exchanged their colorful silk for a plain white when I saw them earlier today at the castle. Only the Order of Ezkai are allowed to wear their black leathers, but we all have thick, long white satin sashes draped over our shoulders.
It’s evident the General was loved, and he’ll be missed. I have no clue what happens now. Who’s going to take his place? And what does it mean for me and my future?
It’s selfish of me, I know. But after three years of feeling angry and looking for the way to my northern star, he finally gave me a clear path.
I was so close.
One step forward, three steps back. That’s how my road to vengeance feels.
Without knowing who’ll be the next Ezkai General, I can only hope whoever takes the place will be willing to have me in their Order. I know very intimately how unwelcoming the fae can be to humans.
By the time we arrive at the base of Halvarra Mountain, there are crowds of people gathered around the large, elaborate archway. None dare to take the path that leads towards the mountain. Patiently, they wait. I’m not sure for what.
We get off the carriage and join the rest of the Ezkai. Every face is grim today.
One last carriage arrives. When the door opens, the Taaslord’s head emerges. He acknowledges the Ezkai with a dip of his chin. Four Ezkai rush to the back of the carriage and open the double door at the back.
My heart drops when they pull out an obsidian cot with the body of the General resting on it. It’s the first time I see the fae not dressed in his leathers. He wears a white silk tunic and pants, his broadsword resting next to him.
Taaslord Noire, followed by the four Ezkai carrying the General, walk up to the archway and take the path towards the mountain. Order of Ezkai follow, and after us, House Dzuni move forward before the rest of the spectators.
It’s a long column of people.
I don’t have to open up my senses to feel the misery, grief, and pain that follows behind us. The emotions are strong enough, and there’s too many of them. They press against my senses. It takes a lot of energy for me to keep them away, and to keep myself centered.
The path winds side to side, following a small river. In some places it intertwines and weaves together before splitting again. Thick, low trees surround us. Not a single leaf moves, there’s no wind.
The sky above us is clear, but I see the dark clouds gathering beyond the mountains.
We take a turn, and a wide staircase carved into the side of the mountain emerges at the end of the path. Six monks dressed in white robes stand at the bottom of the stairs, waiting.
The closer we get to the staircase, the more beautiful and grand it appears. Each step is inlaid with obsidian and enchanted silver, reflecting the sky above. It’s a breathtaking sight.
I imagine walking up those stairs gives an illusion of walking on the clouds high in the sky.
Once the Taaslord approaches the monks, he halts. The monks bow in respect and move out of the way. The Taaslord hesitates only for a moment before starting the climb.
His shadows leave a trail behind him as he climbs, Ezkai carrying the General in his wake. When it’s time for me to take the stairs up, my steps falter.
Daegel’s hand is on my elbow in an instant, steadying me and urging me forward. At the top of the stairs is a platform. Only the Taaslord and the Ezkai carrying the General’s corpse step on it. The rest of us line up on the sides of the staircase.
