This is what I wanted.
This is what I trained for, worked for, fought nails and teeth for.
Now that I have it…why do I feel so empty inside?
The next three days fly by.
I don’t have a moment to think or even be on my own. Every minute of every day from the moment I wake up to the time I go to sleep is full. When I finally get to bed at the end of the day, that’s when the nightmares haunt me.
Even in my dreams, I don’t get a break. Every night, the same dream haunts me. One where I try to not kill Daegel, but the hand that holds the blade doesn’t obey me.
Today is a different day—Vera’s coming. I’m actually excited to see her.
An Ezkai opens the double door for me and I enter the guest lounge. I take a seat at one of the leather sofas in the middle and sigh.
The tattoo in the valley between my breasts hasn’t been burning since the night of the last trial. Lorca’s presence is nowhere in my mind. Somehow, it adds to the emptiness I feel.
I’m so alone I’m tempted to reach out to the trickster god just so I won’t have to be alone with my misery and pain.
Oh, how far the mighty have fallen.
The door opens, and Noire enters. Vera’s right behind him and I jump to my feet. When she sees me, she bows her head and presses a fist over her heart.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” I scoff. “You’re really going to treat me this way?”
Vera smirks. “You’re the Ezkai General. That’s how everyone’s supposed to greet you.”
I roll my eyes and approach her. Before she can say anything, I pull her closer to me and give her a tight hug. For a moment I worry she might not return it. But she wraps her arms around me and squeezes tightly.
“I miss your controlling ass,” I murmur.
“And I miss your brooding face around my studio.”
We both laugh and I step away.
“Thank you,” I say to her. Those two simple words carry a lot of weight. “I wouldn’t have been able to do this without you.”
“You’re welcome. I know you wouldn’t,” Vera says and winks. I snort. “I’m so proud of you for winning. And I’m honored that you allowed me to be part of your journey.”
“I’m proud to call you a friend, Vera,” I say with a smile. “While I am the Ezkai General, our journey isn’t over.”
I glance at Noire, who stands farther away from us. I can’t wait to share the news with Vera. I hope she will be as thrilled about this as I am. Noire gives me a little nod.
Vera looks between the two of us. “What?”
“We made a deal when we first met,” I say, turning back to Vera. “I have all the intentions of honoring that deal. I—we—will work night and day to make sure the law is passed.”
Tears swell in Vera’s eyes. “Thank you. You have no idea how much it means to me.”
I take her hands into mine and give her a gentle squeeze.
“That’s not all,” I say. “There is something I want to ask you. And I hope that you’ll say yes.”
Vera blinks in surprise. “What is it?”
I look at Noire. “As you might’ve guessed, Noire will serve as my second and the master of spies.”
Vera chuckles. “You sure know how to charm your way into an Ezkai General’s good graces, don’t you, Taaslord?”
