Before I get lost in the pain of my grief, the voice is my head says,Everyone who comes here thinks they deserve to rule.
It’s my mom’s shape in front of me. But the voice in my mind is not hers. It’s something else entirely.
I open my mouth to speak, but I’m unable to form words. My tongue and the muscles in my mouth don’t remember anymore how to move to pronounce syllables. I swallow the panic rising in my throat.
I don’t think I deserve anything. I’m here because this is the path I must walk. My only choice.
Another chuckle in my mind. A shiver goes down my back. Invisible claws stroke my mind, light as a feather. But the unspoken threat lingers.
There is always a choice, child.So many paths one may choose to embark on.
I swear I’m not imagining things. My mom’s gaze fills with pain. My heart drops. I try to pick it up, but it’s too heavy.
Agonizing screams fill the darkness, and I’m in physical pain. I shut my eyes and bite my tongue, hoping it will go away if I sit still and endure.
I recognize those screams immediately.
I could never forget them. I have lived through them. Those are the screams that welcome me every time I close my eyes, trying to sleep at night. They haunt my dreams.
The foreign voice in my mind is amused.You had a choice. You made your choice.
When I peel my eyes open, there is another face in front of me. Same hazel eyes, identical features to mine.Fane.I never had trouble identifying my identical triplet sisters because Fane had a scar on her brow from that fight we had when we were five that ended with blood and tears. Lots of them.
As if Fane can read my mind, she smiles. My chest twists in pain at that smile. It’s been so long since I’ve seen it.My dear Fane.I’m so sorry.I reach out a hand, trying to touch her cheek. But it goes through her. The ache in my chest feels like longing, not vengeance, and that terrifies me more than the screams.
It’s not real.
None of this is real.
It’s not my mom.
It’s not my triplet sister.
It’s the damn presence, whoever—whatever—the fuck is speaking in my mind.
What the fuck do you want?
Another chuckle.
Fane’s eyes glitter with mischief and her face loses all the familiarity, all the warmth. It twists into something dark and sinister. I want to move away from her, but I’m rooted in place. I have no control over my physical body.
I want you to see what you already know but refuse to name.
This, whoever it is, can see right through me. It knows things about me…
Don’t try lying or scheming your way out of this, child. Some try, and oh…how fun it is for me. Not so fun for them, though.
I bristle.If you already know what’s in my heart, then why don’t you just get it over with and finish your judgment of me.
The presence hums inside my mind with pleasure.The sweet scent of untamed rage is my favorite.
I can’t help how I feel.
I know I should, but in this moment, every emotion feels so raw.
Fane’s face fades into the darkness. Once more, I’m alone in the dark with the invisible force invading my mind, heart, and soul.
Tell me, what is the true intention of your heart, Phoenix Wildarrow?Before I can answer, it adds,I already know the answer. Do you?
