He looked lazily down at my breasts, inhaled shakily, and ruffled his hair in his anxious way. Once again, it was clear to me that he was holding himself back from jumping me the way he wanted to do, and for once, I was grateful. I wanted to ask him what was making him hold back because I knew that, in addition to being beautiful, my Disaster was also deeply perverse and shameless. For a moment, my insecurities rose up, and I worried that I wasn’t attractive to him, especially given the way I was dressed. But then I looked down at his pants and saw that he was visibly aroused, so I could safely put aside the idea that he wasn’t physically attracted to me anymore.
“Okay,” I sighed, looking down at my fluffy slippers. The same ones that Neil then also started staring at. My cheeks erupted, and I braced myself for an insult or something downright offensive, and…
“Fuck, those are somehow worse than the pajamas,” he grumbled, and my eyes widened with embarrassment.
“Idiot!” I shot back, and Neil just gave another belly laugh. “Okay, well now as punishment you have to go grocery shopping with me. You can carry my bags so that your trip here has at least one purpose,” I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm, and he immediately turned serious again, like I’dtold him the end of the world was imminent. To be perfectly honest, I still had no desire to go out for groceries, but as soon as I saw his alarmed face, I knew I had to do it.
“No, no, wait. What? Shopping? Together? That’s couples shit.” He grimaced and shook his head. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked down his nose at me while I tried not to be distracted by the way his muscles twitched with every movement.
“Do you know how often people go shopping together just to help out a friend? They’re mature, considerate, and—”
“And I’m not like them,” he said, interrupting with his usual arrogance. He lowered his head to make sure I saw how serious he was.
“If you go with me…I’ll give you a reward when we come back.” I said archly. I moved closer to him and traced down his chest with my index finger, moving slowly to his abs. I looked up at him through my eyelashes, but I must not have been very convincing because he bit his lip to hide an amused smile.
“What?” I stepped back and put my hands on my hips, one foot tapping against the floor. If Neil was trying to get on my nerves, he was succeeding wildly.
“You can’t dangle sex in front of me to get what you want, Tigress.” He advanced on me slowly, and I backed up until I hit the wall behind me. I hated—absolutely hated—how confident he was in his mastery of me. “I’m not going to fuck you. Not today…” he said again, propping his elbow up on the wall and checking me out from top to bottom. “Though I must admit, the urge to tear these leggings off you and bury my tongue between your legs is…considerable.” He used his index finger to delicately stroke my throat, devouring me with his eyes like a starving beast. Then he grabbed a lock of my hair and began to play with it. “It’s gotten so bad, I’d probably have to keep you trapped in that pretty little room all day long and…” he moved closer to my ear and breathed in my smell, his muscular chest pressing against my breasts. “Just dive into you.” He took my earlobe between his teeth, and I pressed my thighs together. I probably stopped breathing entirely, but then Neil pulled away abruptly, leaving me off balance and staring at him.
“To the grocery store, then?” he asked. He gave me a mischievous look, fully aware of the power he wielded over my body. Meanwhile, I tried to get a grip on myself. My legs were trembling, and my heart was beating at a gallop, but I tried not to show my vulnerability to him. I went upstairs to change, and as soon as I was ready, I strutted past him like a woman who was completely sure of herself.
***
Half an hour later we stood outside the grocery store and paused in front of the automatic doors. “Ready for a thrilling experience?” I teased, adjusting my coat as Neil took one last drag from his Winston.
“The shit I have to do…” he grumbled, rolling his eyes. “At least no one in this town is going to recognize me out here acting like some whipped boyfriend.” He strolled inside with his usual swagger, and I followed him.
“It’ll be so much fun; you’ll see,” I told him sarcastically.
As soon as we entered, I grabbed a cart and pushed it along in front of me. I glanced back at Neil, who did nothing but huff continuously as we walked along.
“You plan to snort and puff the whole time?” I asked him as I moved around the various shelves, stopping periodically to look at the products on display.
“Are you going to stop every other second?” He pushed his hand into the pocket of his sweatpants, which pulled the fabric taut over the bulge between his legs. My eyes moved there and lingered for a few moments.
“And what product are you perusing now, Selene?” Of course Neil noticed, and my eyes darted back up to his face. His eyebrow was raised, and he had a sexy little smirk that I would have loved to kiss right off him. So, naturally, I turned beet red and awkwardly resumed pushing the cart along.
“Nothing. Don’t get any ideas,” I sighed.
Ignoring Neil, who was giving me a sideways look, I bent to grab a bag of chips and tossed it into the cart.
“Okay, you have to try Better Made chips while you’re—” I stopped when I noticed Neil looking sharply at a graying man right behind us. The guy, who appeared to be in his midfifties, was obviously intimidated andturned away hastily. Neil turned back to look first at me and then at the leggings I was still wearing and frowned at me.
“Don’t bend over like that,” he scolded sternly before walking a few steps away, looking irritable and unsettled. I stayed rooted to the spot, though, trying to work out what had just happened. “Are you coming?” he prompted.
“Is something wrong?” I asked cautiously as he walked along beside me with his hands still in his pockets and his gaze icy.
“Nope,” he answered, sounding annoyed. He didn’t even look at me, so I decided not to push the issue. I stopped again, this time to get some pop and other munchies, while Neil looked blankly at the shelves, a bored expression on his face and his mind a million miles away.
“Hey, pistachios!” Out of nowhere, he darted away from the cart like an overexcited toddler, making me whirl around in surprise.
“Are you insane?” I pressed a hand to my chest in fright, but he ignored me as he grabbed three packages of shelled pistachios.
“These are just for me,” he said, grinning as he tossed them in the cart.
“Don’t worry, I’d never let a package of pistachios drive a wedge between us. We’ve got enough of those already,” I complained, steering the cart toward the candy aisle. “Do you like chocolate? My mother and I go through a lot of it. Honestly, we’re kind of fiends for it and…” I glanced back at Neil and saw that he looked especially distracted. I looked around to see what had caught his eye, and then, not far from us, I spotted an older blond woman absolutely devouring him with her eyes. Neil was definitely reciprocating. He stood there motionless, staring fixedly at her, and she was under his spell.
I wasn’t sure what to do. Watching him slip back into who he had been—who he always would be—hurt. I kept calm and reminded myself over and over that love meant total acceptance and that it wasn’t my job to judge Neil, but to understand him.
