“Tired?” I asked softly, unable to fight the smile pulling at my lips once more.
Matthew hummed. He slid my hand under his shirt, resting it over his rumbling stomach.
“You scared me.” I admitted.
“I scared myself.” Matthew replied, kissing my forehead.
“Who was it?”I asked quietly.
Matthew shrugged “some guy from Stadal. He was in his uniform, I should have…they’re declaring war against us, of course he’s gonna target me.”
“Well, you were pissed. Not thinking clearly.”
“Who’s fault is that?” He mumbled without any real bite.
“Yours? For catching feelings?”
Matthew just scoffed, not offering a reply. He didn’t seem amused by the comment.
“I’m gay.” He mumbled eventually.
I paused. I fought back a laugh but couldn’t help it, cackling, covering my face with my free arm and ending up in a full blowngiggling fit“wow. That...is observant of you, Matt.I never would have guessed.” I sniggered.
Matthew’s brows drew together “shut up, I’m serious. You like girls too.”
“Correction, Ionlylike girlsandyou.”
“Whatever.” Matthew huffed “I’m just saying Idon’tlike girls. At all.”
“Okay.” I replied simply, not knowing whatelse to say “you do you. Sleep.”
“Theo-“
“Shh.” I shushed, nudging Matthew’s leg with my foot “you know you want to.Sleep.”
“Wait a minute.”
I did, patiently. Matthew seemed to be summoning the courage to say what he wanted to.
“I…got told why you’re here.”
My heart sank.I’d had a momentary lapse in logic and attempted an overdose in the bathroom of my crappy place; luckily, my drug addict mother had barged in and had found me just in time. My father, upon hearing the news, got me into fighting as a way of channelling my inner frustration and eventually signed me up to the army when I was good enough.
At the same time, I understood what this was. Matthew opening up about something about him- being completely gay- in return for me opening up aboutthis.I couldn’t even be bothered to muster up irritation.
“I’m fine.” I promised “it was a stupid moment. I’m not…planning on doing something like that again.”
“You sure?” Matthew asked carefully.
“Yeah, Matt. Pretty damn sure.”
He was tense against me. He didn’t believe me.Thatwas the frustrating part.
“It’s not shit to take lightly, Theo, I-“
“Matt.”I huffed “it won’t happen again. Okay?”
“Okay.” He whispered “if you’re sure-“
