When she turned to see that it was Kelsi, she froze. They both looked at each other for a suspended second before simultaneously bursting into tears. They met in the middle of the porch for a fierce hug. “I’m so sorry,” they said at the same time, causing them to choke out watery giggles. Her mom released her slightly, leaning back so that she could look into her daughter’s face.
Not to be excluded, the two dogs launched themselves at them. They were knocked sideways and stumbled as their balance was thrown off.
“You hungry?” her mom asked, smiling. “I have lasagna.”
Kelsi let out a teary guffaw and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, the pair walking inside together.
* * *
Later that evening, Kelsi reclined on her mom’s couch. She had one hand pressed to her distended stomach, slowly digesting the lasagna. The two dogs were piled on the couch with her, sleeping off their own dinners. Her mom walked in with two steaming mugs held in her hand. She offered one to Kelsi before shooing Bailey over so she had room to squeeze on the couch with them all. Kelsi let the tea’s aromatic steam warm her face before she set it aside on the small table beside the couch.
“So, Kelsi,” her mom began cautiously, playing with the tag from her tea bag rather than looking at Kelsi. “How has working with Dylan been going?”
Kelsi understood her mom’s hesitance to ask her about it, considering how she’d blown up on her the last time she asked about work. Now, though, she wanted to spill everything to her and get her advice. Her mom was her best friend and biggest supporter—don’t tell Abby—and she hated holding back from her.
“It’s been surprisingly good.”
Her mom’s eyebrows shot upward so quickly that Kelsi laughed at her. She pulled a pillow from behind her back and threw it at her. Her mom caught it one-handed and tossed it back, narrowly avoiding spilling her mug.
“It has been!” Kelsi insisted once the pillow was tucked behind her again. “We’ve been assigned a case together, and we make a surprisingly good team.” She shook her head and tucked a loose strand behind her ear. “Sometimes it feels like nothing’s changed. But then I look at him and realize that everything has. We’re different people than we were before.”
Her mom nodded her head slowly, considering what Kelsi had said before she responded, “No, I don’t think you’re that different. At least, not in any ways that matter.” She hesitated, looking out at the creek through her wide bay windows. “I watched the two of you grow up, and I watched you fall in love.”
When Kelsi opened her mouth to argue, her mom shushed her with a wave of her hand. “Oh, don’t even bother. You all but shouted it from the rooftops when you were younger, honey. And that boy, he loved you too. So, you both may be a little less trusting now than before. So, you’ve both seen the worst in humanity through your careers. That doesn’t change who either of you are at heart. And I know you’re both wonderful people who love each other deeply.”
Kelsi sucked in a ragged breath as she processed all her mom had said. Finally, she whispered, “I can’t get hurt again, Mom. I’m terrified of being left behind again.”
Her mom set her mug of tea down on the coffee table and leaned over the dogs, gathering Kelsi into a makeshift group hug. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart. Some of that weight you carry is my fault. I wish I could go back in time and do something differently with your father, force him to stay a part of your life, but I can’t. I can only tell you that if you let Dylan back in, now? I don’t think there’s anything in this world that could tear him from your side again.”
Kelsi’s heart squeezed. “Mom”—she leaned back, looking her mom directly in the eyes—“you know I don’t blame you, right? For Dad leaving?”
Her mom’s eyes shined with unshed tears, and the guilt Kelsi saw in them made her own burn.
“I have never once blamed you for him leaving. It’s not your fault, it’s his. If he couldn’t see how amazing you are, that’s his problem. Do I have lingering anxiety over the idea of being abandoned again? Of course. That’s not on you, though, Mom. You’ve always been here for me. I love you.”
Her mom shuddered in her arms and pulled her in tighter for a bruising hug. “I love you so much, Kelsi. I only ever want you to be happy.”
“I want the same for you, Mom. Always.”
Eventually, they released each other, and the two dogs whined and licked away their tears. Feeling lighter and unburdened for the first time in a while, Kelsi watched the sun slowly sink below the horizon. It painted the water in an orangeglow before returning to a deep midnight as dusk settled around them.
“Now,” her mom said, the mischievous twinkle back in her eyes, “what is this I hear about you going on a date with a certain deputy?”
Kelsi blushed and groaned. “I knew I couldn’t keep that a secret for long in this town.”
“Honey. I got a text message from the ladies at church the second they saw him walk up to you in the restaurant. I got pictures.” She pulled her phone out to prove it, swiping through stills of her and Sheridan. Most were of them walking through the restaurant on their way to the table. They were clearly taken underneath someone else’s table, and there was a whole lot of geriatric leg in the shots.
“Wow. I don’t think they got enough pictures,” Kelsi deadpanned. “You know, you should tell them they could make a killing as private investigators. With this level of photo-surveillance skill? They’d be top of the market, for sure. Want me to pass along Abby’s number?”
“Don’t mock them; they mean well. They want to see you happy. The whole town does.”
“I know, Mom.” Her heart warmed, knowing that this town had so many people who cared about her—that was another thing she’d missed about being in a bigger city. But she was also debating whether she needed to keep an eye on those stalkers. Who knew little old ladies could be so creepy?
“Okay, seriously now, Kelsi. Tell me about your date. Was he polite? Did he kiss you good night? Did he ask questions about you or did he talk about himself the whole time? Oh.” She grimaced. “Does he chew with his mouth open?”
Kelsi laughed and explained that he did not, in fact, chew with his mouth open. He was, thankfully, a very respectable close-mouthed chewer. They spent the rest of the evening giggling with each other and the dogs. When Kelsi said goodbye, she left feeling grateful that she and her mom had each other.
Driving home, her thoughts raced. No matter what her mom had said about Dylan, Kelsi knew that they could only ever be friends to each other. To be more would be to risk losing too much of herself again.
