“It’s not,” he replied. “Like I said, the excitement is gone. We’re… stuck. And this is the only way to get us unstuck.”
“Why don’t we just go on vacation?” she asked, a shrill note in her voice. “Jeremy’s out of the house now. Take a leave from work! We’ll go to Europe. We always wanted to tour Europe, didn’t we?”
Now he was looking at her like he pitied her, and that made her tears finally start to flow.
“That won’t fix it,” he said. “I’ve made up my mind.”
His eyes darted to the side, pinging her suspicions. She decided she wouldn’t be pushing aside her instincts any longer.
“Is there someone else, Brian?” she asked. She was proud of how even her voice came out.
“Oh, uh, I…”
He trailed off, and she had her answer. Coldness wrapped around her, and she held onto it like a shield.
“There is,” she said flatly. “There’s someone else.” He looked away, guilt apparent on his face, and she shook her head. “You’re going to be sorry for this one day, Brian,” she told him. “One day, you’ll wake up and realize that whatever this is, it’s some sort of midlife crisis. You’ll look around, and you’ll realize that throwing away our family was a huge mistake. You’ll be sorry. But I’ll be gone. Because you were the one who told me to leave.”
And then she stood, and without a backward glance at the man she’d long loved, the man who had broken her heart, she walked out of the restaurant and away from the only life she’d ever known.
CHAPTER TWO
Eleanor lay huddled on her side until she heard the click of the front door that said that Brian had left. This was how she’d spent the weekend, with only a few exceptions. She’d exiled Brian to the guest room after his gutting announcement on Friday night and had done everything she could to avoid the sight of him ever since. She’d only just managed to get away without breaking down crying in front of him at the restaurant, and she did not plan on giving herself the opportunity to do so now.
Perhaps it was silly, but clinging to her pride felt like the one thing she could control in this crazy situation.
She dragged herself out of bed and headed down the stairs to make a pot of coffee, ignoring all the photographs of her, Brian, and Jeremy, looking happy together as a family. She had spent nearly twenty years in this house, and she hadn’t worked outside of her home since their son had been born. And now…
Well, what the blazes was she supposed to do now?
She caught her reflection in a hanging pot. She’d loved that rack. Brian had grumbled for ages about putting it up for her, but she had always loved the aesthetic of pots and pans hanging over a kitchen island. Now, as she caught her reflection, her face wan with lack of sleep, it felt like mockery.
“You’re a forty-two-year-old housewife,” she told that reflection, cringing at the irony when she thought of happily teasing her own reflection only a few days prior, before that fateful dinner. “You have no career. Your kid is grown. You’re about to be divorced. Your life is basically over.”
If she thought saying the words out loud would give them less power, she was wrong. If anything, she felt worse.
And that was nothing compared to how she felt when she saw a manilla envelope waiting for her on the kitchen table. She slid the papers out a few inches, then shoved them hastily back in when she saw the words PETITION FOR DIVORCE.
It took everything in her not to break down and cry. Brian had told her he wanted a divorce on Friday night. It was now Monday morning. If Brian already had gotten divorce papers drawn up, it meant he’d been thinking about this for alongtime.
How had her marriage quietly died without her even noticing?
The only thing that saved Eleanor from indulging in a good, long weeping session was the ringing of her phone. She almost didn’t answer, since she wasn’t in the mood to speak to most people, until she saw the caller was Lila Johnson, her long-time friend… and the receptionist at Brian’s work.
She took a steadying breath before she answered.
“Lila, hi,” she said, trying to sound cheerful.
Lila’s tone was cautious. “Eleanor, hey,” she said gently. “Um, I just overheard Brian saying something on the phone and… well, I don’t want to stick my nose where it doesn’t belong, but is everything okay with you?”
Maybe it was the knowing tone in Lila’s voice, or maybe it was the pain of keeping everything bottled up inside over the past several days, but Eleanor found herself telling the truth.
“No, it’s not okay. Nothing is okay, actually. We went out for dinner on Friday for what Ithoughtwas our twentiethanniversary celebration but was actually a chance for Brian to tell me he wanted a divorce.”
Lila’s next words were too hushed for Eleanor to hear, but she thought they might be the kind of words one didn’t normally hear from a lady. Although Eleanor didn’t normally approve of such language, but part of her was gratified by the idea that the other woman was shocked enough by this news to let the words slip out.
“Goodness gracious, Eleanor!” Lila said when she’d regained a bit of her composure. “I can’t believe… did you have any idea?”
“None,” Eleanor confirmed grimly. “And, boy, do I feel stupid. I researched the restaurant, read reviews of his favorite meal, and got myself all excited thinking we were going to plan the next chapter in our lives now that Jeremy is gone to college.”
