Bits of glass crunched under his bare feet as he walked into the bedroom without flinching.
He welcomed the pain.
Caius stalkedthrough the halls of his palace, looking for Lauren. She didn’t report to his office that morning, and he hoped she was still in her room.
Once outside her door, he lifted his hand to knock, but it swung open. Lauren’s mouth quirked to the side. “Eager to hear about Rory, are we?”
Caius stepped aside, allowing her to exit her room and follow him to his office. “How is she?”
“You don’t know?” theAngelasked. “I know you’ve seen her in the soulscape.”
He came to a full stop. “She talks about me?” Could Lauren hear the galloping in his chest?
“She’s asking questions.” Lauren said, lowering her voice. “Did you tell her something, or is she remembering?”
“You tell me,” he replied, walking with her toward his office. “She said you told her there was someone in Vincula she mistook for Bane.”
TheAngel’sshort legs kept pace with his long ones, and she side-eyed him as they walked. “I don’t enjoy lying to her, and she asked me directly if Bane was in Vincula.”
Shadows started snaking across the walls as Caius’ agitation grew.What if telling her things puts her in danger?“You should have said nothing at all. I didn’t say you needed to lie.”
Lauren flicked her black and white hair behind her shoulder. “I told her nothing of importance. Do you want her hating you in the soulscape?”
He remained quiet.
“That’s what I thought.” Once inside his office, she turned to him with a tight, sympathetic smile. “It’s okay to let yourself be happy, if only in the soulscape. You’re spending time with her almost every night, and as far as she knows, they’re only dreams.”
“I think she’s remembering,” he admitted.
“Then let us tell her everything,” Lauren pressed. “It will be easier to keep her safe if she knows the truth.”
Caius laughed bitterly. “She doesn’t have her memories, and if she doesn’t think we’re lying, she won’t understand the gravity of the situation because she doesn’t remember. It won’t make her love me, and it won’t make her jump back into the life she had with us.” His words were thick. “Telling her will only put her in danger because she will go to Gedeon.”
Lauren closed her eyes, and Caius wondered if she was counting to ten. Controlling her temper was not her forte. “You don’t know that,” theAngelsaid, emphasizing each word. “It’s not fair to assume how she’ll react. She is smarter than you are giving her credit for.”
Caius clenched his teeth, fighting not to spew words he couldn’t take back. His grievance wasn’t with Lauren, and she didn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of his anger. He was pissed at himself because he didn’t know if his decisions were keeping her safe or putting her in more danger.
“Nothing you’ve done has made sense, Caius,” Lauren said, and his restraint snapped.
“Nothing about love makes sense,” he thundered, making the shadows go in every direction. “Nothing. I did what I thought was best, and I know now I fucked up. Do you think I didn’t know themoment I saw Lenora’s name on that contract?” He fisted his hair, and Lauren’s eyes widened as she watched him fall apart. “I don’t know what to do. What if my decision is the one that sends her straight to Gedeon?”
“I think you should sit,” Lauren said carefully, focusing on his hands. “Calm down.”
His body ignited with fury; or maybe it was grief, pain, sadness, or all four. He couldn’t tell the difference anymore and was losing his sense of self. “I will not calm down when my other half is in danger. Every second I’m awake, I’m consumed with her, and I can’t see her, go to her, protect her, and it’s no one’s fault butmine. Don’t tell me to fucking calm down.”
“Caius,” Lauren shouted above the sound of the shadows crashing around them. “Something is happening, and you need to calm down.”
Her eyes focused on his hands, and when he saw the black veins covering his skin, he cursed and forced himself to control his emotions.
Fresh air dragged into his lungs and cleared the red haze around his mind. The sound of things crashing to the ground filled the room, and he opened his eyes to a familiar disaster. Anything not bolted down lay on the floor, most of it broken.
Lauren still stared at his hands, and they watched as the black veins slowly receded.
She stepped forward and grabbed his hand to examine it. “The last time that happened, you ripped a man’s jaw off.”
“I was angry,” he replied, extracting his hand from hers. It was different this time, but she didn’t need to know that. Hopefully, whatever Kit found would explain how theRoyals’ powers worked.
“Don’t tell Rory anything,” he said, getting their conversation back on track. “I’ll test the waters in our soulscapes. It can be written off as a dream if needed.” He sat down in one of the unbroken chairs, feeling defeated. Sending her to Erdikoa had been a mistake, and no matter how he tried to justify his actions, he’d been wrong.What if he was wrong now?
