She laughed.
“Of course not. I came to hearyou. Didn’t you just say that listening is the best help I can give?”
I laughed softly, then sighed, looking away as I tried to gather my thoughts.
“It’s… okay, Julia. Clara’s adjusting well—at home and at school. Therapy’s helping. And Enrico really is trying. He’s amazing with her. Much more present than I ever imagined he would be.”
“And you?” Julia asked gently. “How areyouhandling all this?”
I placed my hands on the counter, inhaling deeply before answering honestly.
“It’s not easy. It’s strange seeing him there every day, part of our routine as if nothing ever happened. Sometimes I almost forget how much he hurt me… and then something always reminds me.”
Julia watched me carefully.
“But do you believe him?” she asked. “Do you believe he’s really changed?”
I paused, the question striking the wound I’d been avoiding.
“I think hehaschanged,” I admitted quietly. “I can’t deny that. The Enrico I see now looks too much like the man I once gave my heart to. He’s attentive, gentle—especially with Clara. Sometimes it feels like I’ve gone back in time while also moving forward. I don’t even know if that makes sense to anyone else.”
Julia nodded.
“Maybe, with time, you’ll be able to forgive him.”
I shook my head immediately.
“No. Forgiving Enrico is out of the question. I don’twantto forgive him. Even if he’s changed, even if he’s doing everything right now, I can’t just erase what he put me through. The pain. The humiliation. The rejection. Those things don’t disappear just because he decided to change.”
She sighed, understanding.
“I get that. I just don’t think carrying all that weight will help anyone. I’m not saying you should forget—just that maybe you’ll have to face the fact that he reallyistrying.”
My eyes burned, and I looked away quickly.
“I don’t want to feel this, Julia. I don’t want to give him the chance to hurt me again.”
She reached out, resting her hand gently on my arm.
“I know. But I think you deserve some peace. Maybe that peace won’t come from him—but from you accepting that things have changed. Thatyouhave changed. And that it’s okay to let some of that pain go.”
I inhaled deeply, holding back tears.
“Maybe someday. But not today.”
She squeezed my hand.
“That’s okay. You don’t have to force anything. Just know I’m here—whenever you need me.”
I smiled weakly, grateful beyond words. But deep down, I knew that conversation had only scratched the surface of everything I was feeling.
And more than anything, I knew I was dangerously close to losing control over my emotions where Enrico Ferrara was concerned.
***
I had just finished putting Clara to bed, making sure she was comfortable and calm, before closing her door quietly.
The familiar nighttime silence of the house had, at some point, become comforting. The only sound was the soft creak of the floor as I walked toward the kitchen for something light to eat.
