“She looked rough,” I continue. “Both of ’em. Like they hadn’t bathed in weeks. They were filthy. Hungry.”
Momma’s voice drifts faintly from the kitchen, and I stop to make sure Ruby can’t hear me. When she joins in on Momma’s song, I force myself to keep talking.
“She told me Ruby was mine. Said they’d been evicted some time ago. So, I let them bathe, and I fed ’em.”
Pop’s face hardens. “And you believed her?”
“It was pretty fucking obvious they weren’t staying at the Ritz, Pop,” I snap.
“I mean, did you believe Ruby was yours?”
“No,” I admit. “Not at first. But I couldn’t let them leave. The woman was dope sick, Pop. I could see it. Shaking. Sweating.”
“She was a junkie you didn’t even know.”
I shake my head. “She wasn’t when I met her. She was sweet and fun …”
“And a stripper.”
My eyes snap to his. “That’s awfully judgmental, but you’ve always been good at that, haven’t you?”
His nostrils flare at the accusation, but he doesn’t deny it.
“Dancing was just her job. Not everyone comes from a place of stability. People do what they can to survive. Doesn’t make them bad or less than,” I say. “I don’t know what her demons were, but I know we all have them. And whatever she went through in those four years caused her to go down a dark path, but she loved Ruby. I saw it. She was sick, and she did the only thing she knew to do, and that was to bring her to me. To ask for help.”
“So, what did you do?”
“I gave her the money I had in my pocket,” I admit. “She said if I did, I could keep Ruby. She waited until Ruby was asleep, and she left. I could hear her wailing through the walls as she took off down the street.”
He stands abruptly. “Are you crazy? You just took in some stranger’s kid?”
“I took my kid,” I snap, rising too. “I just didn’t know it for sure then. Or hell, maybe I did. In my gut.”
Silence stretches between us, thick and crackling.
“I went to the clinic and got us both tested,” I continue, quieter now. “Swabbed. And lo and behold … she’s definitely mine.”
Pop sinks back into his chair, stunned.
“I knew I had to get my life straight,” I say. “I couldn’t keep working nights at the casinos. Couldn’t keep leaving her with a neighbor I barely knew. That wasn’t a life. Not for her.”
“So, you came here,” Pop says.
“I came home,” I correct. “I’m asking for a job. Not a handout. I’ll shovel horse shit if I have to. I just need a safe place for my daughter.”
He looks at me for a long time. Then he nods once.
“We’ll talk,” he says. “I’m sure Caison can find something for you.”
I let out the breath I was holding.
From the kitchen, Ruby’s voice floats in as her feet come padding down the hall. “Daddy. Papa! Come see. Nana says I did a really good job!”
He stands, heading toward the sound. “I bet you did, Peanut,” he calls back.
Peanut. I haven’t heard that term of endearment leave his lips for over seventeen years. And it guts me.
I stay planted on the couch a moment longer, chest heavy, heart pounding. That went better than expected. I was sure he was gonna make me grovel. And I would have.
