What is taking him so long?
He’s normally right on our heels.
My chest tightens even more than before the game. I glance at Axl, who’s already dressed and quietly sitting on the bench just waiting. You know something’s up when even Axl’s keeping his mouth shut.
Finally, when I don’t think I can take another second, the door opens. In walks Coach Carlson. He’s red-faced with a loose tie, two tell-tale signs he’s already had a little chat with Bill.
This is going to be bad.
“This can’t be good,” Tyson mutters, voicing my thoughts. I shut my locker slowly, hoping to keep the wail at bay in the stone-cold silence.
Carlson opens his mouth to speak but doesn’t get the chance before the door opens again. Bill Baker strides in. He doesn’t pause. “That was embarrassing. I’ve never been more embarrassed in all my years. You didn’t even get one goal.”
Coach holds up a finger, as if to interject, but Bill just barrels on. “Seriously, guys, you’ve got one job: get the puck in the net. What I saw out there didn’t even look like you knew what game you were playing. I’m not convinced everyone here even wants to be on this team. I was hoping for a relaxing weekend, but you ruined that for me. I’m taking a long look at the lineup over the weekend. Changes need to be made.”
Maybe it’s my imagination, but Bill’s eyes seem to home in on me, then Tyson, then back to me. I swallow, afraid to blink. This is my first year on the team. The others have played together for years. How can this be on me? I follow Bill’s gaze as he takes a turn looking at each one of the guys, and then walks out, leaving the tension thick.
All eyes swing back to Coach.
Maybe he already knows who’s losing his job.
If he does, he doesn’t show it. He judiciously avoids eye contact with anyone. His gaze floats above our heads, which is not like him at all. “Guys, I know you’re disappointed,” he finally huffs. “I will not harp on you tonight. I wish we could be celebrating, since this was our last game, but I’ll wait to make sure my contract is renewed before I celebrate anything. For now, get plenty of rest over the weekend. Be ready for big moves next week.”
With that, he strides to the door, leaving it to swing closed behind him. I wish I could say the tension in the room felt lighter now that the meeting is over, but it creeps in even thicker.
It’s days like this I start to wonder if any of it’s even worth it. It’s my dream to play hockey as my career. I get that the pressure comes with the jersey, but this is not a normal level of stress. My stomach is so tight, it feels like I’m hanging on the edge of a cliff, about to free fall with no parachute.
“Who do you think is getting fired?” Axl finally breaks the ice, keeping his voice low. For someone whose job is on the line, hesure doesn’t seem stressed. He’s slouched on the bench like it’s a recliner, smirking as if he thinks this is all a joke. I guess you can act that way when your wife is a famous pop star, and you have all the money you could ever want. Everyone knows if he goes, it’s only to move up to the NHL.
I’m in a completely different position, having barely made this team. As the newest guys on the roster, Tyson and I keep our heads down.
“My bet it’s either Tyson,” Axl continues, eyes flicking to him, then cutting to me. “Or Elijah. That lineup change was too sus.”
My palms leak sweat as he says exactly what I was thinking. “Thanks for the confidence boost.” I mutter sarcastically, trying to act casual, not like I’m dying inside.
“Did he say what that lineup change was all about?” Jackson, normally quiet, asks me. “It seems like he wanted to wear down their guys, but it backfired. In my opinion, Coach misplayed it this time.”
Grinding my teeth, I struggle not to vent. He’s my boss, and I owe him respect, even if I’m so mad my blood feels like it’s boiling. It’s becoming clear that fingers are going to be pointed my way. I should’ve known. It was all a set-up. I still can’t shake the niggling thought that my parents had something to do with this. They want to be able to blame Koren for my failure. The only way they could do that was to make sure I had the worst game of my life, and the timing of everything is too convenient.
“Do any of you guys think—” I start but stop, even though the thought still pulsates in my head. No good can come of speculation, except the risk that word might get back to my parents. For now, it’s best I keep quiet about my suspicions until I have proof.
Axl picks up my dropped thought, “Bro, it’s you. Nice knowing you. We can all visit you when you’re washing dishes at Red Barn.”
“Ha ha. Very funny,” I say low, half-hoping no one hears my voice crack. I’m thinking the exact same thing. I have no job skills. I never went to college. Not that it’s too late, but it’s awfully embarrassing to get fired and have to start all over. My parents will never let me hear the end of it. They certainly aren’t going to help me with a career change. Not unless I come crawling back to work for them, and that’s not going to happen.
Tyson forces a tight chuckle; his stress is audible. “Axl, you’re not helping the morale at all. And you didn’t exactly score any goals today either, so I wouldn’t be so sure of yourself.”
I shoot him an appreciative look, even though I know Axl didn’t say anything everyone else wasn’t already thinking.
“No one knows anything yet,” Jackson says, hooking his bag on his shoulder and angling toward the door. “For all we know, we all could be out of a job.”
Swallowing, I stuff down my fears. True, we could all be out of a job. but Bill took the time to glare at just two of us: me and Tyson. And I’m the one who already got a verbal warning and that weird lineup change. I try to hide my trembling fingers as I retrieve my hockey bag. I’m ready to get out of here. Nausea churns in my stomach, and I’m about to be ill. People get fired all the time, but it’s different for me. I don’t have a supportive family. My dad will literally make my life a living nightmare. “I guess we’ll all find out next week,” I mutter, feeling as if I’m already metaphorically walking out the door.
“Hey,” Tyson says, falling in step behind me. “Don’t stress about it. If it is you, it doesn’t mean hockey is over forever. It might just be a new direction.”
Though I appreciate Tyson’s positivity, I don’t want a new direction. Granite Ice makes sense to me because Koren is here. Her flower shop is here. She doesn’t want to leave this little town, and neither do I. I want this. This locker room. This team. This life with Koren. It’s perfect. I don’t think our brand-newrelationship can handle a trade right now. But I don’t say that. I just nod.
Koren’s already standing next to my car when I finally drag my feet over. Her petite arms cross over her chest, but she grins when she sees me. She’s the only thing in the world right now that can make me smile.
