“I know we kissed—”
“I can forget it if you want. It was too soon. I’m sorry if all of this is too soon. I just wanted to tell you,” I risk another bout of soul and heart shredding, “that you’re the kind of woman, and Ari is the kind of daughter, that man would wait an eternity for. If he knew you were coming to him, a man would wait at one end of the universe while you walked from the other. I would wait. I’ve been waiting so long, and when I—” I stop and shake my head. “I know you could do better, honestly, and it’s too soon to be anything more than people who share a home, but that’s enough for me right now.”
“Why?”
I wish she hadn’t asked that. “Because you’re everything I want. I’m afraid to tell you the rest. I’ll scare you away. Forget it, I shouldn’t have—”
Loretta rises when I push back my chair. Her voice is tense, her face a mask of tight lines, but even that can’t change how gorgeous she is. “Is it because you’re falling in love with me?”
If I say yes, she might leave. If I say no, I’ll be lying to my mate. With a tortured look and a guilty voice, I admit, “Yes.”
“I’m a mess.”
“What?”
“This is the messiest point in my life. I have a baby. I’m in the middle of a divorce and a restraining order!”
“I know. I’ve been paying attention,” I say softly.
Arianna, who is sitting in a special supportive rubber baby seat strapped to a chair at the table, makes a happy squeal as she flips over some plastic cups and bowls that Loretta lets her play with.
“There is no good reason to want me. I bring nothing to the table.”
“I disagree. You bring everything I’ve ever wanted to the table. If you want me to wait until you’re the head of an international corporation who brokers deals for breakfast and wears powersuits to bed, I’m willing. If you need to have ‘power’ and money so you feel like you have a more equal footing, then I’m here for it. I’m here for you and Arianna. Any way you come.”
I wish she’d say something. Or nod. Or even breathe.Wait, is she breathing?“Loretta, honey,” I say, too sharply, “you need to take a breath.”
She nods, shuddering out a wheezing sound, eyes full.
“You can tell me no. You know that, don’t you? I’d still be your friend. I’ll still help you and protect you, even if you don’t want me to be anything more than that nice guy who helped you out when you were in a jam.”
“I don’t want to tell you no. I want to t-tell you I’m falling in love, too, and I’m so scared. What if you’re not the nice guy? This is way too fast, and if I make another mistake, people will say, ‘There goes Loretta, she married too young, and she left him only to pick up with another loser. Oh! Not that you’re a loser. Not that I believe, not that I can see, but if I—” Her eyes overflow. “If I choose badly, everything that’s bad will be worse, because I’m falling in love, too.” She circles back to her declaration with a sob.
I rush to her, nuzzling my face in her hair, inhaling the scent of her, and practically licking my lips. Sleepy wolf is waking up inside, well aware that this warm, clinging woman is supposed to be ours. “I promise I will never, ever rush you, and I’ll never, ever hurt you. I’ve never been in love before. I’ve waited all this time to find the woman I could treat like my queen, to complete my life and my home. We can take things slow. We can enjoy it. You can heal and learn how nice love can be, and I can do all those corny things I’ve been dreaming of, like sending you flowers, taking you out to dinner, and walking in the mall while our hands are clasped together on the handle of the stroller.”
“And come with me to courtrooms and custody battles, and watch me fall apart,” she mutters into my shoulder, fists clutching desperately at my shirt.
“Yeah. All of that. All of that is part of loving you, so all of that is okay with me. Look, you still have things up in the air with Matt and the divorce for at least another month. We won’t talk about this until after that, and then you can set the pace. Unless you want to talk about things sooner.”
“Okay.” Loretta nods gratefully, pulling back to look up at me. “I’m sorry that I’m a mess.”
“I don’t mind the mess. I don’t even see a mess. Just you.”
Well, that must have been the right thing to say, because Loretta melts into me, hugging me tight, but this time her body presses into mine, and her hands rest on the sides of my face, so she can hold my head still and really study me, it seems. And then she kisses me, long and slow and sweet. The kind of kiss that roasts you over a low flame, and you want to stay and feel the burn.
So, naturally, Miss Stinker hurls a green WPNR cup right at my head. It bounces off, and we pull apart.
“You’re supposed to be on my side,” I whisper.
“Dadada. Dadadada!” Ari gurgles and makes grasping hands in my direction, arms raised. She’s thrown all of her plastic arsenal, and she wants freedom. Or, she thinks that she’s cute enough that I’ll help her reload, even though she hit me with friendly fire. I go and unbuckle her and pick her up. “Well, you’re right. You are cute enough, tiny missile launcher. Come on, let’s help Mommy get all of your projectiles off the floor.”
DADA. SHE SAIDdada. Jasper didn’t make a big deal of it. Maybe he thought it was just baby babble, but to me... It was so much more.
Is Ari falling in love with him, too?
He’s spent a lot of time with us. I’ve never told her to call him dada. She could have heard the twins call Alban that last night. She’s smart. Matt and I used to try to get her to say it to him.
She probably thinks any tall human that looks masculine is dada, like any white woolly thing is lambie.
