“And… while I’m at it and not out of courage yet, thank you for saving me, too.”
“Have I saved you?” I asked. Playing mind games wasn’t my goal, but I wondered if she was still under the impression that she was worse off living with me than not.
“I meant that in regard to when I was captured.” She cleared her throat. “And, I guess, otherwise, too. I…” She let out a deep breath. “It’s been hard to understand how I was told so many things about you and expected the worst here when that’s not the reality I’ve come to see and experience.”
“Your mother’s family was very jaded,” I admitted. “I never pushed to bring you here because for so long, I thought you were better off without me while I learned to be the leader I am.” And I wouldn’t shy away from the pride I truly did hold with that. “But now, I see that you weren’t any better off with them.”
She shook her head. “I think I’m still trying to understand where I belong and how I could be happiest.”
“I’m trying to understand it all as well, Anya. No family is ever perfect.”
She backed up a step, giving me a small smile. “I know. I’m just… glad we have the chance to try.”
Without another word, she retreated and left the room.
In the wake of what felt like a godsend of a breakthrough, I smiled. She had really taken a leap of faith to come speak to me. What she said mattered, and I took it to heart. With her gratitude and honesty, I felt more prepared to get out of my head and check on Claire.
I found her upstairs in my room. No. Inourroom. It seemed like she’d just gotten done with a workout and was finishing with a shower, but as I walked past her workout gear on the floor, I wondered if she’d chosen a second workout today because she needed to vent after seeing Jack. After knowing I’d killed for her again.
“Oh!” She stopped short as she exited the walk-in closet. “I didn’t hear you come in.”
“Sorry to startle you.”
She shook her head and came to hug me, at ease and smiling. As if seeing me brought her joy, not guilt or dread.
I could only hope it would always be like this.
Gathering her in my arms, I picked her up and hugged her tighter. I pressed my face against her face, drawing in a deep breath of her scent.
“I wasn’t sure whether you were busy with something or avoiding me,” she said once I carried her to a chair and sat with her in my lap.
“I was thinking,” I admitted, unsure how to start the conversation that I wanted to have with her.
“Me too.” She furrowed her brow and sighed. “I hate that he said that.”
“What?” I didn’t want to guess incorrectly.
“When Jack kept saying that I was ruining my life by standing with you.” She licked her lips and stared at me with so much openness and love that I felt like a fool to doubt her. As she liftedher hands to frame my face, the touch of her soft fingers on me soothed my restless soul.
“My life isn’t ruined because of you,” she said confidently.
“It isn’t?” I brushed her hair back, marveling in the miracle that she could be mine. That she could be this steadfast in choosing me.
“No.” She shook her head before she leaned in to kiss me tenderly. “You saved me, Mikhail.”
“So you want to stick around out of gratitude?” I asked, slightly teasing.
“No. Iamsticking around because I love you.” She kissed me again, but this time, as I felt the smile of her lips against mine, she swung her leg over so she could straddle me. “And I look forward to proving that to you every single day.”
Turned on from her kiss alone, I watched the sparkle of excitement and lust in her eyes as I pushed her robe off her shoulders, revealing all her bare, succulent skin that I couldn’t wait to taste.
“I’ll never be able to escape all my sins,” I told her.
“You don’t need to,” she promised. “Because this”—she pressed her hand over where my heart beat as she lifted my hand to rest over hers— “this love redeems us.”
I slid my fingers up from where her pulse thumped faster. Snaking my grip around to the back of her neck, I urged her to lean down and kiss me again.
She was my salvation. Having her—and my daughter—in my life went a long way to making me feel whole, complete like I never had been before.
