I let it go. Tyler obviously didn’t want to talk about the nightmare night he’d had with Andrews. But I understood now. I wouldn’t feel guilty about anyone on Tyler’s list dying, but I did regret that he’d felt like he had a reason to put me on it.
They’d all hurt the man I loved.
Hell, maybe I should be on the list because I hadn’t stopped my dad from hurting him.
Fuck, I hadn’t done enough to murder those men for Tyler. And eventually, he would find out. What would he think of me then?
15
TYLER
The heat from Eddie’s car blasted my face and I sighed in pleasure. I hated the cold, and it was snowing outside, flakes falling in droves that made me think we were on the precipice of a nor’easter. Or just a lot of damned snow.
We’d moved Warren’s body together, dumping it in the same spot as Mike—which had taken us at least an hour longer on our own, plus an exasperated phone call to Ari—and it was a lot more effort with only two of us. Luckily, Eddie had a headlamp for each of us that he kept with the ski equipment in the back of a closet. Considering his coordination, I didn’t even want to imagine him hurling himself down a snow-covered mountainside. Warren had driven his car to Eddie’s, so we’d torched it and left the husk deep in a forest close to Seldom Seen, a small town far outside New Gothenburg.
Now we were driving back home, and Eddie was quiet.
Too quiet.
Had I upset him?
I snuck a look at him, and every time a streetlamp or headlights lit up his face, I took in his ruddy cheeks, burned bywind, and the way his mouth was pursed. He was lost in thought, half focused on the road. It was as though he was a million miles away. Could I reach him?
Did killing these men affect him? I’d never asked Eddie to do it, and while I wasn’t sorry they were gone, I didn’t want him to lose himself for me, either. He was gentle and kind, and yes, a klutzy mess, but he wasmyawkward chaos.
Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas Is You” came on the radio, and I cheered as I spun up the volume knob. The poppy beat filled the car, and Eddie groaned, making me laugh.
“She’s unfrozen for the year and back in business, baby. It’s really December when Mariah’s playing.” To be honest, it was the only Mariah Carey song I knew. I danced in my seat, arms flailing as I moved in time with the beat, jiggling my ass, even though I could barely move it with the seat belt on.
“It was playing at the mall. Didn’t you hear?”
“Nope, too busy concentrating on you,” I said, before I returned to my song.
Eddie watched me out of the corner of his eye, and while I couldn’t see his full expression in the darkness of the cab, I felt his smile because it was warmer than a thousand suns.
I sang along with the lyrics, swooping in to lay my head on his shoulder as I belted out the chorus. He tried to keep a straight face, but I didn’t miss his wince and choked chuckle.
“Don’t give up your future plans. You weren’t meant to be a singer,” he said over a particularly loud yell from me as I got into the groove of the song.
I didn’t let him get me down, pumping my arms up in the air as I continued to scream with the lyrics, not ashamed that I got a few words wrong or that I was very off-key. It was the thought that counted, and by the end, I was panting in exhaustion. Joy bubbled in my chest. When was the last time I’d let go this way? I couldn’t remember.
“How did I do?” I plopped a kiss on his cheek as we came to a red light, and he pulled the car to a stop. He gave me a look that said what he really thought, and I laughed, falling back against my seat. “Come on, you’re the one who has carols on at home.”
“Not Mariah Carey.NeverMariah Carey.” He shook his head very seriously.
I gasped. “Are you insultingtheMC?” I gaped at him with all the dramatics I had in my lackluster acting skills, which were about as good as my singing. “I have to rethink this relationship. I’m not sure how I can look at your face anymore after hearing this.”
“Sorry, baby.” He sent me a grin.
I froze, the nickname ringing in my ears. Baby? No one had ever called me something so sweet, and my heart took off in a gallop. “Did you just call mebaby?”
Eddie eyed me nervously. “Yeah. We’re together and I thought you wouldn’t mind.” His hands squeezed the steering wheel. “Is that silly? I don’t have to call you that?—”
“No. You can call me that. I like it. A lot. I want to be your baby.”
“Deal. No one else is allowed to call you that. You’re officially my baby.” The corner of his mouth ticked up into a half smile and he winked at me.
I rolled my eyes. He was so sweet. If someone had asked me a few weeks ago if Eddie was the type of person to murder three men, I would’ve laughed and told them to go back to whatever insane asylum they’d escaped from. He wouldnever.
