EPILOGUE
MICAH
Nerves ate at my stomach,and I rubbed it, cursing myself for being so anxious about the trip. As excited as I was about finally leaving the country and going to Japan to meet Yukio’s ojiichan, I was also not used to straying from my comfortable life and routine, which included New Gothenburg.
“What’s wrong?” Alex peered at me carefully, and I sent him a worried smile. He’d helped Yukio move into my house last month as soon as baseball season ended, and since then, he’d begun to come around to our house for dinner once a week. While I couldn’t say Alex and Yukio werefriends—because who’d want to be after Alex treated Yukio so badly, even if Alex regretted it—they did get along a lot better as the weeks passed.
One afternoon as he was helping Yukio move, Alex had dropped a box full of clothing and announced quite abruptly that he no longer liked Yukio and he was dating a man, though he didn’t tell us who, even though Yukio needled him about it.
Alex’s blushes were new, and I enjoyed seeing my son happy, and I finally understood what Sarah and Jiro meant about their kids’ happiness being the most important thing. I couldn’t remember a time when Alex smiled as much as he had since he’d started dating this mystery man.
“Dad.” Alex laughed and poked me in the side.
I straightened where I sat on the bed, miserable as I stared at the open suitcase and piles of clothing on the floor.
“I asked you a question,” Alex said.
“Nothing.” I shook my head. “Everything. I really want to go on this trip, but I’m so nervous. What if his ojiichan doesn’t like me?”
“You’ve talked to him before, right?” Alex blinked at me, clearly confused.
“Yes. Briefly. He doesn’t speak much English, and I’m learning Japanese from Yukio, but I’m far from fluent.”
“So? They say communication is more than spoken language.”
“Who says that?” I glared at him because I thought he was making it up, and he grinned wider.
He shrugged, a tinge of red streaking across his cheeks. In that moment, he reminded me of myself. It was funny what being in love could do to a person. Not that Alex was in love, or at least, I didn’t think he was—yet. I hoped he would trust me enough to bring around someone he was in love with.
“Are you sure you can look after the house?” I peeked around my room and the chaos of clothes and personal items everywhere. I’d been trying to figure out what I wanted to take with me, and I was at a loss. I had no idea what anyone took to Japan. Yukio had one tiny bag and said it would be fine.
“Dad.” Alex gave me a hard stare. “I’m an adult.”
“I know, but you won’t have any parties, right?” I was only joking, and I offered him a smile to let him know.
“Oh yeah, I’m going to throw a massive kink party. It’s BYO sub.” He laughed when I threw a pillow at him and it hit him square in the face.
“Have you talked to your mom lately?” I asked seriously.
Some of his joy dampened and he shrugged again. “Yeah, a little. She wants to reconnect with me, but I don’t know, Dad. I mean, I was always so angry at you for being stuck in your own head, but at least you supported me how you could. She left me and started a new family. Half the time she pretends I don’t exist. She likes Grandpa better than me.”
I nodded. “That’s fair. You don’t have to forgive her, Alex.” I held out my hand to him, and he took it, letting me drag him to sit beside me on the bed. “She hurt you, and she knows that, too. Or she should, anyway.”
“It’s weird. She wants me to meet my little brother. We’ve never talked. He’s thirteen, Dad.Thirteen. A teenager. Then I’ve got a younger sister, too, and she’s ten.” He frowned. “I know she’s trying now, but she doesn’t get to just come back into my life after she forgot I existed for so long.”
“Part of that is my fault. She was waiting for me to move on, maybe, before she opened up again. She should’ve never pushed you out. I know you’re hurt, and I’m not asking you to let her back in completely. You’re right, she doesn’t deserve it.” Gods knew, I was surprised to hear from her. Since the first chat with her when she spoke to Yukio, I’d spent an hour every week filling her in on Alex’s life, and she’d listened. I couldn’t pinpoint the change, but I owed it to Alex to help support his chance to connect with her again. I rubbed his back. “Whatever you decide to do, I’m here.”
He gave me a small smile. “Thanks, Dad. I’m sorry I was such an asshole to you. I was so quick to blame you and be angryat you. I forgot that you were there for me when she wasn’t.”
“It’s easier to blame the people we love the most.” I nudged him with my shoulder.
The front door opened and closed. “Hello? Hanii, are you here?” Yukio’s voice echoed through our tiny house, and I grinned, my heart fluttering. Even after many months of dating, he still made my body react in the most delicious ways.
“We’re in the bedroom.”
“Who? Are you cheating on me? He better be at least twice as good-looking as I am or I’ll be pissed.” Yukio’s teasing had me rolling my eyes and Alex laughing. He came into the bedroom and grinned at us. He was still dressed in his gym gear with damp black hair, and the scent of sweat and cologne tickled my nose. My cock twitched, and I sighed in pleasure at the familiar smell. I could never get enough of him.
“How was your workout?” Alex asked, and there was something sad in his voice that told me he missed it. I regretted having a part in that situation.
