“Ye’re as useless as tits on a bull with this shite. Why don’t ye focus on yer own job?” I winked at him to take some of the sting out of my words. Normally I wouldn’t have been so free with him, but we were in the gym and things had gone okay today.
“I’ll do that.” He was chuckling again by the time I left to go upstairs to my room. Sometimes Jamie crawled under my skin and drove me around the bend, but he wasn’t a terrible guy, so I tried not to work myself up over anything he’d said. I took a quick shower to get the sweat off my body, then went and flopped on the bed with my towel around my waist.
Fecking Aspen.As long as we’d known each other, he’d never treated me this way, like I was just some bloke off the street. Someone he didn’t give a shite about. I rubbed my chest and sighed. After my workout I still felt like seven piles of donkey shite, so it didn’t take long for me to rustle up some lube for my palm and start stroking my cock.
There was always one guaranteed way to lift a man’s mood, and I wasn’t opposed to using it. I idly wished for my toy collection, but I hadn’t had anything delivered here and, to date, I wasn’t brave enough to pack anything like my favorite stroker in my suitcase. Even when I had my boys around I still rubbed one out solo on the odd occasion, so this didn’t hurt me none. I settled in and closed my eyes, thought about watching some porn, but I had enough good things in my mind to get my engine revved and keep it hot.
Licking my lips, I stroked faster and harder as I imagined Vail’s beautiful mouth and how good it felt underneath mine and on me. It was so bright and curvy and opened nicely for me. I hissed and squeezed my cockhead.
Vail was so pretty when he rode me and used me like his personal sex toy to get off. I loved the nights when he was starving for it. Some days he would open those big brown eyes and I would just know I was in for it and every drop of cum my balls produced would end up in his arse or mouth or on his creamy skin before the day was done. He could take six or seven loads from me—and whoever else was around—as if it was nothing. He was fecking insatiable, and I felt like I’d stepped into a magical fantasyland when I was buried in his arse watching him swallow someone else’s cock.
Arching my hips, I slipped into memories of him kissing Fallon. They were beautiful together, and I loved it when Fallon fucked Vail. I loved Fallon’s hair brushing over Vail’s body as Fallon kissed his runner’s muscles. It made me want to grab Fallon’s golden strands and use them to hold him down while I fucked him. Even better, I thought about the way Fallon’s mouth fell open when Vail was pumping away between his thighs. They were gorgeous. My mind naturally went toward Aspen between the two of them, fucking one, then the other—the way he owned them and made them yell.
Now I know what it feels like to be Fallon and Vail.
When Aspen flung Fallon around, his hard biceps would strain. He looked so fecking amazing biting Vail’s or Fallon’s nipples... and his lips were fantastic on mine. And that thick cock in my arse felt better than I would’ve fecking thought. I strained, not one to deny myself anything, even if I was fecking furious with Aspen. It had felt so different to come with him inside me... and I kinda fecking missed it already.
Roaring out my pleasure and rage, I jerked off faster as my cock twitched against my palm and bright white jizz painted my abs. I wiped my hand off on the blanket. I punched the bed repeatedly, but it didn’t help.
Aspen had no goddamned right to be angry with me. Feck him. I understood what I’d done that had upset him—I hadn’t allowed Vail to get carried away in some la-dee-dah dream where me and Aspen were as in love as he was with Aspen, and we fucked whenever we felt like it and everything was fecking happy.
Me and Aspen had no idea what this thing happening between us was going to be, now that we had changed the rules, and it wasn’t fair to get my wee bug’s hopes up. He was so sweet, and while he loved a good, hard fuck as much as anyone, he wouldn’t understand it if Aspen and I were fucking, then cooled off with each other when Aspen went back to being uninterested the second there were two very beautiful and willing arses around. Hell, Vail’s feelings would likely be more injured than mine if that happened.
I closed my eyes.
Yeah, Vail’s wee feelings would be hurt beyond repair if Aspen dumped me flat and he never got to see me get fucked.
I sniffed and cleared my throat.
It wasn’t fair to get people’s hopes up.
I swallowed hard.
And I wouldn’t let him get Vail all excited for something that might not work out. Aye, for Vail’s sake, I was trying to keep things under wraps.
And Aspen had to go and get annoyed about it. He wouldn’t even yell at me and just clear things out of his system.
I wiped my hand off on the bed again because there were still a few drops clinging to my skin. Tomorrow Aspen could decide that this wasn’t for him—or next week or month—so there was no point in making a big deal about it. I lay on the bed staring at the ceiling, feeling the same as yesterday’s trash. I pounded my fists off the blanket again and my shoulders ached. My back still stung from the sunburn. I’d worked out until my arms felt like lead, but it didn’t seem to matter.
“I don’t give a feck. Let him act that way,” I said, testing the words out loud, but I didn’t need Rowen here to tell me I was full of shite. I didn’t care if someone was angry with me, except for Sloan. But that wasn’t exactly true anymore. I didn’t like it when Eamon and Rowen were upset with me. I absolutely wouldn’t want Vail to hate me. Fallon.... Yeah, I was all right with him being a wee bit irked at me, but not flat-out enraged.
And Aspen?
As far as I knew, he’d never been ready to do me in. Not once. We always meshed. Our goals were always the same. Things were alwaysgoodbetween us. Aspen didn’t feck around; he was serious when something got under his skin. I rested a hand over my eyes and breathed deeply. It wouldn’t surprise me if we went back home and he moved out. He could probably convince Fallon to go, and if Fallon went Vail might go as well. Then Rowen would be a twat and he would leave.
Then what?
I would be in that housealone. Maybe Eamon would visit when he needed money or someone to bitch to about his girlfriend.
A cold chill slithered down my spine. Somewhere in the back of my mind I’d worried about just this since I’d had it out with Da. I wanted to say I didn’t need any of them and just laugh and go to sleep. Hell, six months ago I would’ve.
I sat up on the bed and scowled around the room. Aspen wasn’t talking to me, so I was right. There was no point in telling anyone to begin with. He could kiss my arse. I wiped the cum off my abs with the blanket, then crawled under it. My mind spun with the same arguments over and over again—and sometimes I sounded cleverer to myself than others. The longer I rehashed the conversation I’d had with Vail, the more I was sure I was right.
I was equally as certain I was fecked in the head.
I ran a hand along the bed at my side and thought about calling Vail, my bug, my sunshine, but he would be asleep at this late hour, and if I woke him up, he would have trouble getting his shut eye. The damned bed felt huge. I patted the right side, which was what Aspen seemed to prefer when it was only us.
Around three in the morning I was revising my argument with Aspen for the millionth time—and of course, I was winning. My phone vibrated and I snatched it up to glare at the screen.
