Sidorov and Sloan did their thing where they shook hands and said goodbye, and when Sidorov drove off and left us alone, Sloan turned to us. My breath caught again because there was a stormy irritation in his gaze.
“You got lucky this time,” Sloan said as he scowled at each one of us, looking more ominous in the glare of lights. “This is your last chance.” He stopped at Cillian, eyebrows raised. “Don’t mess up again or I’ll give Ardan the honor of taking you out, and then I’ll have Vail pissed off with me, which will make my pet mad because he and Vail are best friends.”
Conall chuckled. “That’s true.”
We all bowed our heads in respect, and Sloan huffed.
“Get in the car. I’ll take you home to your pretty academic.”
We couldn’t argue with that.
12
FALLON
On the drivehome I wanted to tangle my fingers together with Aspen’s because nerves twisted in my stomach, but I didn’t. Instead I clutched at the supple leather seat and held my breath for half the ride. Sloan’s face was a death mask occasionally lit up by the headlights of other cars on the road, and his fury made it difficult to breathe. Unlike the time when we’d all been together at the pool in his glitzy Midtown apartment, nothing about this felt good or safe. That night I’d been floating on a cloud, and it was like someone ripped that fluffy ride out from under our feet, and we were all plummeting toward the cold hard ground. Even with Conall at his side murmuring God knew what in his ear, I worried Sloan might ask the driver to pull over and shoot us all for fucking up.
Aspen was cool. Didn’t fidget. Sat straight and tall. The pressure hit him and didn’t stick. Even though I wouldn’t let myself touch him, I tried to act like him. Rowen kept glancing between Cillian and Sloan, as if he wanted to talk or ask questions, but he didn’t. He ran a hand over his head, and the lights from outside struck him, illuminating his grayish-blue eyes and turning his hair an electric red for a brief flash.
The whole mood was a little weird and a lot stressful. I felt fucking terrible for Cillian. His jaw was tight enough to crack walnuts, and his brown eyes practically sparked each time I accidentally made eye contact with him. I flashed Conall a small smile that he returned as the limo stopped in front of our house, and he shifted to glance out the window, only to let out a sad sound. “Oh, I wish we weren’t busy tonight.” He pointed at Lor’s shiny Audi, which I was fairly certain had been provided for him by Conall pouting at Sloan. Lor had never moved out of the mansion, and no one was really sure what was going on there, but it made everyone’s lives easier, so I hadn’t heard Vail, Conall, or Lor complain. “It’s a party.” He gave Sloan a hopeful smile, but the boss only shook his head.
“No. As you said, we have plans we can’t break.”
Conall didn’t huff, but he crossed his arms as he sat back. “Bye,” he mumbled to us as we got out, and I waved at him, but no one else so much as made a peep.
Like I said, it was a little weird, and I hated it. Usually Conall was a blast.
As soon as we were all outside, Cillian stomped toward the front door, his body bouncing with the force, as if he thought he might be able to put his feet through the ground and lose himself in a pit. When he got to the house, he shoved the door open so hard that if anyone had been standing on the other side they would’ve died from a concussion. Rowen sighed and took off after him, muttering under his breath.
Aspen only glanced at me and shook his head, a small smile tugging at his lips.
“What?” I asked.
A tapping on glass had me turning to wave and smile at Conall as he gave me one last finger twiddle and the limo pulled away down the street, Sloan’s face lit up behind him as he scrolled on his phone.
Aspen sighed and stuffed his hands into his pockets, dropping his head back to look at the sky. Snow clouds boiled around a sliver of the bright moon, and the stars seemed cold and icy. I shivered as wind blasted my face. “We do have to be careful. Sloan won’t overlook bullshit that costs him too much money or allies, but Cillian gets riled up in ways that don’t fit the situation. We fucked up, yeah, but I’ve been in the Company awhile. Your brother Padraig has done a lot worse, and hell, even Fionn has done stupid shit here and there. Everyone makes mistakes.” He leaned closer to me and whispered, “Even Sloan. Don’t let these guys convince you they’re gods.”
His warm breath in my ear had me shivering and some of the tension from the limo ride eased out of my body. “Yeah, true, but we’re not all the boss’s nephew like Fionn,” I said, my stomach sinking. “He’s going to get more leniency than we will.”
It occurred to me that Aspen was talking a lot, like he had when we were out of the city, and excitement sent tingles racing over my skin. I rubbed at the back of my neck.
Aspen shrugged. “Don’t follow in Cillian’s footsteps. You keep moving through these problems. You look for the way to make it right and eventually you will. You can’t get stuck on everything that went wrong.” He reached out and squeezed my elbow. “We have your back, all of us.”
“Why are you telling me this right now?”
He pursed his lips and cut a long look at the house again. Light all at once blazed in the front windows on the third floor—Cillian’s room. “Because... Cillian doesn’t do embarrassment. He doesn’t do failure.” He stared at the house and shook his head. “I’m worried he’ll either take it out on you, or....”
“Or?”
“Or he’ll take it out on himself. But you did okay.” He studied my face until it burned with the flutter of happy emotions that bubbled in my chest.
“Thanks.”
“None needed, I’m just letting you know.” He took off toward the front door at a steady pace and I trailed along behind him. Cillian and Rowen hadn’t shut the door, and as soon as Aspen pushed it open I could hear Vail laughing, and Lor’s voice carried. I couldn’t make out the words between him chuckling as he tried to talk at the same time, but the amused sound was enough to drive off more of the seriousness that had settled over everything from the meeting with the Russians.
Just inside the door there was a trail of mud leading up the stairs, and I didn’t see Cillian’s boots with everyone else’s shoes by the door. His winter gear had been tossed on the floor, though. He hadn’t even attempted to do anything with it. I kicked my boots off and shrugged out of my jacket, flinging it over the railing of the stairs to put away later, in a way that would have Rowen huffing and puffing when he saw it. While I headed into the living room, I grinned at the thought of how he would lower his eyebrows and narrow his eyes and act like a parent.
“So, Dr. Mifflin turns to these high school guys, and they still don’t realize we’re there to tutor them because apparently there were crossed wires, right? The mom of the boy who paid us forgot to let them know he’s coming. They thought Dr. Mifflin was there to coach them on how to cheat on the SATs, which is what the kid’s dad had hired someone to do.” Lor was sprawled on the floor on the other side of the coffee table, across from where everyone else sat on the couch. The white stripe in Lor’s black hair was freshly bleached, and he’d added a bright pop of purple to the tips that had me staring. His brown eyes were large as he glanced around at everyone to emphasize his story, and his round cheeks puffed out as he held in a laugh. The skull on the hoodie that clung to his slim chest was hot pink and had a patch over one eye, and he rubbed a hand over it as he finally let his laughter burst free.
