Declan helped me get the other boot on without touching the snow with my socks. I stood and hoisted the pants, slipping the straps over my shoulders while he set to work pulling the laces on the boots tight. I hadn’t had anyone help me dress… probably since I was a kid. It was nice, and had me feeling odd—a good strange. “They’re a little big, but I’ll get them as tight as I can and they’ll work.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“Let him,” Jake said and pushed the straps of the pants down again. I stripped my coat off, and he forced the collar of the sweater down over my head. I laughed and tugged it on over my shirt, and then between the two of us we got the straps on the pants tightened fast. “Trust me, he doesn’t mind. Dec’s sole purpose in life, other than hockey, is making sure everyone who is able spends time in the snow.” He laughed and patted Declan’s head. They shared another one of those looks that had longing squirming in my stomach. They were just too in love for words.
“I’m not sure I’m going to be very good at this,” I said. Declan stole my winter coat and replaced it with a heavier one, handed me some heavy-duty gloves, and finally he tugged a soft pink cap with flaps over my ears.
“There. What do you mean? Good at what?” He adjusted the flaps, and I stood very still while he tied a string under my chin.
“How ridiculous do I look?”
Jake snickered. “Oh, you’re a sport. He tries to do that to me, but I won’t let him.” He was hopping into his own pants, and finally Declan stepped back with a flourish and beamed at me.
“I went sled riding as a kid,” I said to Declan, and he nodded in an encouraging way. It had been a while since I had anyone really pay attention to me when I talked, and stage fright came over me for a second. “Uh… but it’s been… well… a long time.”
He laughed and turned to help Jake switch out his coat for one that matched the hat I had on. “Why?”
“I don’t know.” I worked the gloves on, and a dull heat burned in my cheeks. “My brother made fun of me for being a baby. He was a jerk sometimes, but I think I stopped because he kept giving me hell about it.”
Jake frowned. “Rude. I hope you punched him a lot.”
“Yeah, no. He played football.” I gestured at myself.
“Boo,” Jake said. “You gotta learn to go for weak spots, that’s all.”
Declan rolled his eyes at Jake. “Well, come on! We can hit the hill until we’re hungry, unless you are now?”
I shook my head.
“Oh, your bear claw is in the SUV,” Jake said. “Don’t let me forget, or I’ll end up eating it later.”
Declan laughed. “How does that happen?”
“It just does.”
“You can’t bring it in the house for me?” Declan shook his head slowly at him like they were discussing a tragedy.
“No, I’ll eat it on the way.” Jake took Declan’s hand, and I followed them over to the rental truck. Declan talked to the owner and got us two snowtubes, one single and one double, which looked like two inflated tires stuck together, and would let two people ride down at the same time.
The sun peeked out from behind the clouds for a few minutes as we went to the top of the rise and gazed down to the bottom far below. The crown of the hill was about half a football field around, which left plenty of room for places to depart, and many people appeared to have called an area as their own with camp chairs sitting around. The height was almost dizzying, and fresh white snow glittered off in the distance, stinging my eyes.
Surrounding us were a lot of parents with their kids, some riding, too, some not, but there were also a few guys like us, just out to have a good time. There seemed to be some sort of etiquette I wasn’t familiar with going on, as people took turns to go when they were close to each other, but I wasn’t sure I knew enough not to get in someone’s way. I watched one girl, who didn’t look older than about ten, take off at a run with her red hair flying behind her from under her winter cap. She held her snowtube in front of her, flopped onto it as she went, and zipped down the hill with a scream of delight. She hit supersonic speeds, or at least I imagined so. Her parents gave us apologetic smiles, but Jake and Declan only laughed.
“That, uh, is kinda fast?” I felt ridiculous being more nervous than an actual real-life little girl, but they were nice enough not to give me shit about it. “The sleds I had never went like that.”
Declan wrapped an arm around my shoulders, which wasn’t difficult for him, and gave me a friendly jostle. “It’s lots of fun. Let’s enjoy it. The snow might be gone for the year after this.”
“Yeah, you can go down with Dec if you’re scared.” Jake whapped my shoulder, and I scowled at him, but his laugh wasn’t mean.
“I’m not scared! But let me see you guys go first.”
Jake came over and drummed his hands on my back, urging me toward the lip of the hill. He massaged my shoulders like we were in the corner of a boxing ring. “Come on. Go down with Dec.”
“Don’t badger him, sweetheart.”
“I can do this,” I said, and forced a grin, but my insides were an excited tangle of adrenaline and horror. They seemed confident in their survival, and the little redheaded girl was already trudging her way back up the hill on the far side away from where people were going down.
Jake dragged the double-seater snowtube over closer to the edge. “Come on, Dec. No one’s going right now.” His husband did as he asked, and I sighed at how easily they worked together, talking quietly and laughing. “Now you, Logan. Come on!” I didn’t dawdle as much as I wanted, but it took me a second or two to go over and sit down. My ass dropped into the hole on my side of the snowtube, and I was hugged in the doughnut of the seat, my butt awkwardly lower than my knees. My legs were spread and Jake came to kneel between them. He held out his hands and tugged me into a better position, and I felt oddly vulnerable. My heart raced.
