Corbin snorted but didn’t say anything else, only turned up the music on a rap song I didn’t know.
8
Hunter
“You can’t just leave, Hunter. It’s the middle of the night.” Forrest stood with his arms crossed, blocking my Street Glide. My bike had been parked here in front of the Virtue when I got back, riding on the bitch seat of Scar’s bike, and I probably had Jamie to thank for its return, too, not that I’d ever get the chance.
Forrest was wearing the same type of clothes he’d gotten me into, a long-sleeved shirt made of gauzy cloth that flashed his abs and was almost not there at all. His pants were red and made from the same material as sweatpants, but they were definitely cut to show off his ass and junk. He hadn’t dressed like this in New Gothenburg, and it made me… not embarrassed, exactly. Anxiousness twisted in me as a man going into the Virtue stopped to stare at him and then switched to look at me with a hunger in his eyes I didn’t like. I flipped the guy off, and he hustled on inside. Forrest rolled his eyes but didn’t yell at me. I’d stopped to tell him I was leaving and grab my Kings’ jacket, and now I regretted that decision. This would have been so much easier if I’d just jetted for home. I glared at him, and he stared right back.
“Yes, I can leave.”
“But why?” He walked to me and stared down at my leg, which I wouldn’t let anyone near. I just wanted to go home. I wanted to be away from here, away from the place where things werealmostgood. I tugged at my jacket.
“Don’t want to talk about it.” I stared down at my gas tank and used my thumb to scrape a small piece of road crud from the side.
“Is this about Jamie?”
“Said I don’t want to talk about it,” I whispered.
He let loose a sound like a cat that had its tail stepped on and then moved to wrap his arms around my middle. I stiffened, but he didn’t let go. I didn’t like being forced to touch anyone, but this was Forrest, so I let him hold on. He sighed when I couldn’t relax into him the way I knew he wanted. I was just too hurt and mad right now.
“When will I see you again?” he murmured in my ear. “We barely spent any time together.”
I shrugged, feeling like a fucker, but I knew without a doubt I couldn’t stand to stay here again tonight. I wouldn’t be able to deal with sleeping next door to Jamie when I had touched him and held him earlier. Fucked him. The memory of him underneath me, his eyes trusting, body tight around mine, thrust into my gut like a knife. It hurt to even think about him, since we were done.
Jamie on the other side of a wall would be the worst thing.
And to know I’d ruined it? It was too much. I knew better than anyone that once things were broken, they stayed that way. There was a small part of me that wanted to go to him and try to see if anything was salvageable, but I’d never been able to make that work anywhere in my life. Either things broke me, or I broke them and moved on. Families. Foster siblings. Clubs. I sucked in a deep breath and slipped my arms around Forrest to hug him back, and he rested his head against mine. I didn’t want to lose him.
“I’m sorry.”
“For what? Just stay.” He rubbed his hand along my side in what I’m sure he thought was a comforting way, but I wasn’t ready for it. The touch struck me wrong and I stiffened up again. I shook my head. “What are you going to do?”
That’s a damned good question.I’d go home and King and I wouldn’t be able to look each other in the eye, and eventually he’d lose interest in having a son and I’d get the boot out of the Kings too. I had no plan after that, but I saw it all unravel in my head, like a highway that unfurled and just kept going toward hell. I wanted to stop, get off that track, but there didn’t seem to be a way to do it.
I started my bike, and Forrest let go. I slid my helmet on while he watched.
“Please don’t do this. At least wait for Grant and Reaper. I don’t want you riding back on your own. It’s not safe.” He gave himself a little hug and stood there with his arms crossed over his bare stomach. “Grant said they’re getting ready to go, and the others already left for home, but you don’t have to.”
That all sounded too much like what Jamie had said to me when he was yelling. Did everyone think I was a pussy who couldn’t defend myself? Was this because Forrest liked to hide behind Rourke, and everyone here knew it? Being mean about Forrest, even in my head, made me feel guilty. In the end, none of this mattered because I was going home.
I started forward, and Forrest darted in front of my bike, making me brake so hard I almost tipped it. Someone blasted on their horn in the street as they whizzed by, and I walked back a few steps into the spot while Forrest grabbed my handlebars. “Fuck, that’s dangerous.”
He glared, and I stared right back into his eyes.
“Tell me what happened today. Don’t make me get it out of Jamie.”
“Nothing, except I’m going back to New Gothenburg.”
“You wanna be that way, sweet tart? Go. I don’t need you here. You were trying to get out of being here before you ever left home, so run back to New Gothenburg with your tail between your legs.” Forrest’s eyes were alive with an intensity I’d never seen in them.
His words hurt. I knew what he said was true, but knowing I was a coward and hadn’t hidden it still sucked.
Forrest winced and made a noise. “Oh, goddamn it. You know I want you here with me, I’m just… let me throw a fit, please?” He huffed in my direction.
That had me smiling a little, but I wasn’t any less determined to leave. “Me being me in a different place. That’s what happened today. Thought I was doing right. Turned out I was doing wrong. Same as last night. Same as always. I’m going home before I get arrested.”
He slapped his hands to the top of his head and stepped aside, onto the sidewalk. Not too far back, one of the guards from inside loomed. The people on the sidewalk went well around him. “Arrested for what?”
