I closed my eyes and sank my head against the luxuriously soft pillow. Within seconds, fatigue caught up with me, and I fell into a hazy slumber.
5
Viol
I couldn’t fucking sleep.
My thoughts wouldn’t calm the hell down and turn off, so I tossed and turned uselessly. All it did was agitate me. If I was the kind of guy who drank, I’d drink myself into a stupor, but I knew that’d only make me feel more like shit.
Finally, I threw off my blanket and stormed to the window. Hours had passed, but I was wide awake, same as when I crawled into bed.
I stared out across the island with bleary eyes. What was going to happen in the morning? What fuckery had Jade planned? If his scheme was to push Poppy and I together, he was shit out of luck. I’d already screwed up my first interaction with him. Hell, I’d screwed up alot.It wasn’t going to get better.
Melancholy twisted my chest so hard it was physically painful. I leaned my elbow against the window, bracing my forehead against it.
This sucked.
I couldn’t walk up to Jade and order him to send Poppy home. He was already here, and worse, we’d already spoken. Itwould be hurtful and rude to turn him around as soon as he got here.
But what was the alternative? Let him stay, get his hopes up for nothing? I couldn’t do anything for him. I couldn’tbethere for him. I’d already proved that over and over.
I gritted my teeth. Growling, I pushed away from the window, walking in irritated circles like a caged animal. I despised feeling powerless.
Maybe in the morning I’d make one last-ditch effort. I’d plead my case to Jade and beg him to send Poppy home. Or at least make it so that I didn’t have to talk to him. Hell, I’d compromise. Poppy could stay on the island for as long as he damn well wanted. It was probably better than whatever shithole human apartment he was living in.
I just wouldn’t look at him.
Or speak to him.
Or acknowledge his existence.
Maybe then he’d forget about me and move on with his life like I desperately wanted him to.
A snarl of frustration escaped me. I fell backwards onto the bed with a thump, then stared angrily at the ceiling.
Poppy had felt distant when I helped him to his room. He seemed wary, like he was afraid to get too close. After what I’d done, I didn’t fucking blame him. Iwasdangerous. It was for the best that he stood far apart from me.
Unless it was all in my head.
Was I overreacting, or underreacting? Was I crazy? I felt crazy. The difference between reality and imagined bullshit in my brain blurred together, distorting my perception.
I dragged my fingers across my eyes. Every part of my body ached with exhaustion. I wanted to pass out and be unconscious for a damned good while. But as the minutes crawled by, I saw the brightening tint of the sky.
Today was going to be a long fucking day.
In my dream,I stared at Cobalt’s door.
It seemed unusually large. But I wasn’t afraid. Cobalt was always so kind. And besides, I had my buddy clutched in my hand.
I pushed my shoulders back and took a deep breath, fired up with determination.
I’m gonna do it,I thought.
I knocked enthusiastically, and Cobalt called for me to enter. A smile tugged at his usually stoic mouth when he watched me prance inside.
“Good morning, Violet,” Cobalt said. His gaze fell to the plush toy dangling from my fist. “And Wolfy.”
I beamed. I loved when Cobalt greeted both of us.
