I stared evenly at Jaeyoung. Like Paz, he had dark circles under his eyes. He’d probably been up all night staving off the effects of the drug. And judging by his strange pose and nasty attitude, I assumed he hadn’t given in to temptation. That must’ve been immensely difficult.
I shrugged. “You’re right. Iwoulddo a better job if I was a true captain. I’m starting to doubt if I even deserve this title. So, I’m not here as your captain. I’m here as a fellow human, and I’ll get to the point. Are you okay?”
Jaeyoung unclenched his jaw. My response seemed to disarm him.
“No,” he replied. “I am not okay. I’m under the effects of some unknown disease, experiencing ridiculous symptoms and...urges.” As he said that last word, he glanced at the door before quickly meeting my gaze again.
I guess he never talked to Paz before they split for the night. Poor Jaeyoung thought he was alone in his erection embarrassment.
I shook my head. “It’s not a disease. It’s just the fruits we ate last night. They were aphrodisiacs.”
His shoulders slumped as understanding dawned on him. “They...” He sighed deeply. “Yes, of course they were.”
I shuffled uncomfortably, not sure how to phrase my next question. “Did you ever, er... take care of it?”
“No,” he admitted. “Although it’s useful to know it’s simply a physiological reaction.”
He gave another sidelong look at the door, almost as if waiting for somebody. But Linn’ar said he’d shooed him away. I wondered if Jaeyoung was struggling with his urges. He had way more self-control than I did. When I was under the full effects of the fruit, I’d practically begged Zat’tor to plow me.
I quickly pivoted from that thought before it awakenedmyurges again. I cleared my throat. “So, do you plan on trying to fix the ship today?” I asked.
Jaeyoung slowly unravelled from his upside-down position. He stood up and rolled his shoulders. “I might try.”
Unease wriggled in my belly. Just thinking about leaving Eukaria made me queasy.
“I see,” I said, trying to sound neutral.
Jaeyoung saw right through my efforts. “You don’t want me to fix the ship. Is that right, Levi?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“No. But you’re thinking it.”
My gaze dropped to the floor. “I don’t know,” I admitted, rubbing my arm. “I just... I like it here. I like the people and the planet.”
“You prefer it to Earth,” Jaeyoung said. A comment, not a question.
I exhaled through my nose. “Yes.”
It felt good to admit it, but it also frightened me. The rest of my life depended on this choice—but honestly, it wasn’t hard to make.
“I think you should wait to decide,” Jaeyoung said, not unkindly. “If you were also under the effects of the drug, your choice was made in an altered state of consciousness.”
I bristled at that remark. “I felt the same way before I ate the fruit.”
Jaeyoung nodded. “Okay. Just think about it, Levi.”
I didn’t bother correcting him. It honestly felt freeing not to have to becaptainanymore.
Zat’tor got sick of waiting outside. He waltzed into the den, latching onto my side like a remora on a shark. “Are you finished with your discussion?” he asked.
“Yeah, I think so,” I said.
Zat’tor turned to Jaeyoung. “Linn’ar wishes to know if you are well. He is quite concerned.”
A fleeting expression crossed Jaeyoung’s face. Surprise mixed with something warm. But it was gone as soon as it appeared.
“Yes, you can tell him I’m fine,” Jaeyoung said.
