Now that I was here, I was completely unsure of what to do. I knew this was John’s apartment, but I didn’t know his unit number - and without that, I wasstuck.
Hislastname!
I rushed inside the lobby, eyes scanning for a list of names of the residents. My heart did a flip when I found it. My eyes ran down the list, searching desperately forTurner.
Thereitwas.
Hesitating for a moment, I forced myself to press the button next to his name. A phone line noise filled the lobby as he was alerted. But what if he didn’t want me here? What if he didn’t letmein?
“Hello?”
John’s grainy voice came from the speaker. From what I could make out from the bad quality, he soundedmiserable.
I swallowed hard. “Hey, John, it’s Vincent. I… Could you come down for a minute? I have somethingforyou.”
The line went silent. For a moment I was afraid John had hung up. My heart stopped. But then he spoke in a low, grainyvoice.
“Comeuphere.”
I wasn’t sure I’d heard him properly. “Sorry? You want me tocomeup?”
“Yes.It’s402.”
The harsh sound of a buzzer filled the lobby. John had opened the main door for me. My spirits lifted. If John was inviting me up to his apartment, that must be a good sign…right?
I was too anxious to wait for the elevator so I made my way up the stairs. Sweat beaded at my forehead and my palms were clammy. I wiped them desperately on my jeans. The last thing I needed right now was to look like a disgustingsweatymess.
The hallway had a particular smell - not unpleasant, but veryapartmenty. It was clear this was an older building. I thought about the night before in front of my own apartment. Had I accidentally embarrassed John? I didn’t mean to make him feel that way at all but I was mentally kicking myselfforit.
One of the doors in the hall was open. I approached it. Inside, the lights were off. Judging by the numbers on the doors, the dark unit belongedtoJohn.
“Hello?” I called softly, standing a few feet back from the door. It was like John’s apartment had a forcefield around it that I was afraid to touch without hispermission.
I swallowed thickly as John appeared in the door. His eyes were puffy and red - the same way they had been when we first met. My heart stung. He had been crying again and it was myfault.
“John,” Imurmured.
“Sorry,” he said, wiping his face with his sleeve. “Um.Hi.”
“Are you okay?” I asked, then felt stupid for asking because he clearlywasn’t.
“A little. Actually, not really.” He paused. Now he had an expression that was something similar to a smile. “But the flowersaremaking me feelbetter.”
I had completely forgotten about them. Hurriedly, I held them out to him. “These are for you.” I tried to remember what Florian taught me. “I think the tulips are forforgiveness.”
John looked confused as he took the bouquet in hand. “Forgiveness?”
“For my behaviour last night,” I said, glancing down. “I… I shouldn’t have rushed things like that. I came on too strong and it pushed you away. I’msorry.”
John stared at me. Then he startedlaughing.
“Oh my god. You actually thought - Vincent, I can’tbelieveyou.”
I stared,dumbfounded.
He shook his head, wiping his face on his sleeve again. “I wasn’t upset with you at all. It was totally, 100% my issue.” His smile turned a bit sad for a moment, then he perked up once more. “Listen, do you want to come inside? I mean, I know the hallway’s very exciting, but I’m sure it’s nicerinhere.”
My heart was racing too fast for me to even chuckle at hisjoke. “Sure.”
I entered the darkness of John’s apartment and was instantly overwhelmed by the scent ofhimeverywhere. It sunk into me like a weighted blanket. My mouth watered. I forced myself not to take a deep dragofit.
John stood across from me in the front hall. We stared at each other. The water droplets on the bouquet glittered softly in thedarkness.
My mouth went dry. Even if I could think of anything to say, it wouldn’tcomeout.
Never taking his eyes off mine, John slowly moved to the counter and placed thebouquetdown.
Then he steppedtowardsme.
