“Used to what?” I asked. “They were staring at you like youweresome…”
I trailed off, not wanting to offend him by saying anythingstrange.
Vincent only shrugged and avoided looking directly at me. “I don’t know. Something about my appearance intimidates people.” He sighed and tried to perk up. “It’s fine,really.”
“It’s not fine,” I said firmly. “How can they judge you when they don’t even know you? They think because you’re a big alpha that there’s something to be afraid of? God, I hate peoplelikethat!”
He blinked,surprised.
“Sorry,” I said with a big sigh. “That kind of thing riles me up a lot. You’d think even in a close-knit culture like ours things would be different, but I guess there’s the same kind of peopleeverywhere.”
“Yeah,” Vincent said quietly. “Actually… I was worried you would be afraid ofme,too.”
My jaw fell open. “Me?Why?”
Vincent shrugged. “I told you. I’m used to it by now. Whenever I meet someone knew, I kind of assume they’re going to be off-putbyme.”
“No, I…” I shook my head and gently squeezed his hand. “I don’t know why anyone would think that. I don’t think you’re scary at all,Vincent.”
He looked startled. “You’re the first person to ever say thattome.”
I nearly choked. “Geez. You must be hanging out with the wrongpeople.”
“Maybe so.” He shot me a small smile. “I guess it’s a good thing I haveyounow.”
That sent a shiver of excitement down my spine and I blushed again. “Yeah.” Every time he looked at me with that handsome smile I lost my mind. How was I gonna deal with this for the entirenight?
“Come on,”Vincentsaid.
We ambled leisurely down the sidewalk, holding hands all the while and talking about nothing in particular. It was so easy just to chat with Vincent - like I’d known him my entire life. I loved the way he brushed his thumb across the palm of my hand as he spoke, telling me stories about his work. I felt like a smitten idiot, just nodding along and listening, but itfeltgood.
Without even realizing, we passed the complex of apartment buildings that I lived in and entered a new section of the street. Here it was lush, with many more trees and flowering bushes decorating the side of the road. Even the apartments here were nicer; the building before us looked new, with modern architecture and brand new glimmering glasswindows.
“Hey,” Vincent said, stopping suddenly. “This is actually myplacehere.”
An initial shock hit me.Thiswas where Vincent lived? In the nicest apartment in the entire pack? I suddenly felt very small. Anxiety swept through me, making me doubt everything the way it always did. Why was Vincent interested even in me? He had a great job, an amazing living space and was a hot alpha… Why was he wasting his timewithme?
And would he even be wasting time dating me if he knew I could never havechildren?
“Say,” Vincent began. “Did you want to comeinside?”
Panic flared. It was late and he was inviting me to his apartment. There was no way this could end well. I had to cut this off before we both got invested anydeeper.
I pulled away, my hand slipping out of his. Vincent’s brows furrowed inconfusion.
“John?” heasked.
“I can’t,” I said, avoiding his eyes. “I just - I can’t do thisrightnow.”
Vincent looked hurt. “But why? Are you okay? If you don’t feel well, I can take care of you at myapartment.”
“It’s not like that,” I mumbled. Guilt and shame gripped me. I felt wretched for making Vincent worry, but he didn’t deserve to worry about someone like me. He would be better off without me. Without an infertileomega.
“John- “
“I should go,” I said. “I’ll - maybe I’ll see you again. Bye,Vincent.”
The alpha stood there, staring with his jaw open in shock, as I turned and left him therealone.
I hurried back to my own apartment, which was a dump in comparison. When inside, I threw myself on my bed and buried my face in the pillow, crying in frustration and wishing I was good enough for Vincent. My stomach was tight with anxiety and stress. Ifeltsick.
But it had to be done. I couldn’t lead Vincent on like that anymore. If I hadn’t been a coward, I could have just told him in the first place and saved us both thetrouble.
But Iwasacoward.
I curled up in a tight ball, prayed my stomach wouldn’t be ill, and forced myself to try and get somesleep.
