I don’t know that I’ve ever been this nervous—and I’ve walked onto a lot of stages in my life.
I stand, careful not to appear as buzzed as I feel, push the barstool in, thank Max, and walk slowly to the door wondering, with every single step, what it is I think I’m doing.
* * *
Zion
Penetration: check
Oral: check
Silence: check
Lights out: check
Physical requirements: tall and muscular. Not too big.
Whatever that means.
“You’ll like her,” says Benji, who’s monitoring. He’s a tall, calm guy I have a deep respect for. The kind of person you’d want on your team no matter where you’re headed or what you’re doing. I’ve seen him defuse a fight that seemed inevitable, in seconds. And he’s pretty handy with a pair of safety scissors. “Max was gushing.”
“Why didn’t Max partner with her?”
Benji smirks. “Max isn’t her type.”
I glance at the page again and read the section on likes and wants. I can do whatever I fucking feel like to this woman, apparently. Aside from anal.
Perfect. No faces, no voices. We’ll use each other to get off and never be the wiser.
No harm, no foul if I happen to think about someone else the whole time.
Finally, at that, my cock comes to life.
“Which room?”
“Five. You in?”
At my nod, he puts the form in the outbox and lets me into the pitch-black anteroom, where we both allow our eyes to adjust, then leads me to door five. “You know my limits, right?”
“No shit, no bareback, no kissing.” He smirks. “I’ll make sure she knows.”
I go inside and wait. A minute later, Benji lets the other person in in total darkness.
I’ve always loved this moment. The calm before the storm, or whatever you want to call it. It’s the indrawn breath, the quiet before the movie, the moment before a jump. Right now, we can turn back or do it.
It’s the Schrodinger’s Cat moment when anything is possible. The woman who just walked in could be anyone.
I take my time, inhaling through my nose, and smell… Oh, that’s… What is that? Why’s it familiar? Why’s my cock suddenly standing at full fucking attention? I exhale, let her hear me. Inhale again, anticipating that scent, which… Is it what I got a hint of earlier, in the dungeon? Flowers and… I don’t know. Springtime? Sunshine? Fuck, it’s frustrating. Whatever it is, it’s shooting straight to my balls.
I’ve got to hold my breath for a second just to think straight. And, when I do, I hear her. She’s breathing hard and fast. Quick inhales that tell me she’s nervous. Even from this distance, the exhales heat my chest. Is she working extra hard to get oxygen through a mask, like me?
There’s also a sound of friction. Cloth to wood? Is she pressed to the wall? Hiding? Scared?
My stomach tightens. I want to talk, dammit. I want to tell her she’d better be fucking scared. I want to hear that nervous gasp move into moan territory. I want to know what she sounds like when I slide my cock down her throat and tell her how good she is.
Isshe good?
I take a step. Her breathing stops.
