Lou laughed. “I imagine it’s a role he’s comfortable playing.”
Callum narrowed his eyes. “Since the two of you have apparently bonded, your first task can be to help Derek with this presentation.”
Her mouth dropped open as she gave the encircling crowd a hunted glance. “Uh…presentation? To kids? I’m not…well, very good with kids. In fact, they tend to hate me.” The terror in her voice matched what Derek felt, and he gave her a commiserating smile.
“They’re waiting for you to begin.” Jerking his chin toward the group, Callum turned and began walking away.
“Wait!” Despite his best effort at not showing fear, Derek knew his panic was obvious. “You’re leaving me here? Alone?”
“You’re not alone,” Callum said, tipping his head toward Lou. “And I’ll be right over there. Observing. Weren’t you just saying that I should laugh more? I’m thinking this might be an excellent opportunity.”
Well, shit. He couldn’t argue with that.
Reluctantly turning back, Derek faced his audience. A funny-looking kid in the front licked at snot running from his nose to his upper lip. Holding back a wince, Derek forced a smile.
“Hey, kids. How’s it going?”
All thirty-eight of the Simpson Elementary School third- and fourth-graders stared at him, unsmiling. Despite the December chill, Derek felt sweat prickle his forehead. When he shot Lou a desperate glance, she returned an equally fraught one and shifted behind him, putting his body between her and the kids.
Derek cleared his throat, making a mental note never to seriously piss off Callum again. The man was positively diabolical when it came to punishments. “I’m Derek Warner, and I’m going to tell you about the Field County Rescue Dive Team.”
“Where are the firemen?” demanded a girl with dark curls poking out from under her stocking hat. “Ms. Belcher said we were going to see firemen.”
“No firemen.” Derek frowned. Apparently, even girls under ten had a thing for firefighters. “Divers are way better.”
“Nuh-uh.” The girl scowled at him.
“Uh-huh.”
“Nuh-uh.”
“Totally better.”
“Are not.”
Lou’s amused snort interrupted the argument, and Derek took a deep breath. “When people fall into the water, the dive team rescues them. We also…” His words trailed off as he turned his head toward Lou. Out of the corner of his mouth, he muttered, “How do I explain body recovery to kids without traumatizing them?”
“Um…I don’t think it’s possible,” Lou whispered. “Maybe you could use Barbie and Ken dolls to demonstrate?”
“What?” Realizing that his voice had risen, he lowered it to a hiss. “That’s a stupid idea. Besides, I don’t carry dolls around with me.”
“Just don’t mention dead people then!” she whispered back.
“Where are your fire trucks?” asked the snot-licker.
“We don’t have fire trucks. We have a dive van.” He waved toward the converted ambulance parked ten feet away.
The kids looked unimpressed. One mini-Neanderthal toward the back wasn’t paying attention at all, too busy stuffing a fistful of snow down the neck of the girl in front of him. The girl yelped when it touched her skin.
“Hey!” Derek snapped. “Knock it off.”
“Chase DuBois!” The all-too-familiar voice made Derek stiffen. How had he missed thatshewas here? Usually he had a divining rod crossed with a cattle prod inside him, giving him electric shocks whenever Artemis Rey was near. “If you can’t behave, you’ll be sitting in the bus with me for the remainder of the presentation.”
Derek allowed himself a quick look. She was at the back of the group, standing next to the fourth-grade teacher, Marnie Belcher. Artie towered over the kids, and he wondered once again how he’d missed seeing her. After all, she wasArtie, and he’d been panting after her since he’d been old enough to know that “hot” meant more than just a temperature. He gave her a nod of appreciation, and she smiled back at him, her delicate features somehow looking even more striking in contrast to her lumpy, hot-pink stocking hat. It appeared that she was attacking a new knitting hobby with more determination than skill.
A jab to his back brought him out of his Artie-inspired daze. “You have to do something, or there’s going to be a mutiny,” Lou whispered. “And that wouldn’t go well, since there are more little people than big people. They’d have a chance at winning this thing.”
He glanced around the crowd; the natives were indeed getting restless. The only other adults besides him, Lou, Artie, and Marnie were the two chaperones standing off to the side, too busy with their whispered conversation to pay much attention to the kids. Lou was right—the grown-ups were completely outnumbered. “What exactly do you think I should do? Dance? Sing? Magic tricks?”
