“Keep going,” I told him, urging his hips toward mine. “Come on. I want you to get there,too.”
He was slower to start up again, but after a bit, his hips took over. He thrust a few times, then slowed for one or two, then sped back up to that relentless pounding. I wanted it like this, I wanted it fast and hard as hell. I could tell, after a bit, that he was almost there. It was the way he stopped making noise, dipped his head to bite my shoulder and slammed into me, out of control and messy and so damned perfect. A couple dozen times and he was done, pressing into me hard and deep—silent until it was over and then still, his weight heavy on me. Heavy and warm and everything Iwanted.
“You okay?” I finallywhispered.
He shook with what I hoped was a laugh. “Jesus. Yeah. Better than okay.” He turned to take my mouth in a possessive, happy kiss. “Is it weird to say I loveyou?”
I shook my head and kissed him back to cover up the big, ugly cry trying to claw itself out. It was raw and emotional, this thing he’d set off inside me and I had no idea what to do with it. I wanted to answer, to give him back those words, but I was suddenlyscared.
9
Zach
“That wasthe wrong thing to say, wasn’t it?” I asked on my way back from the bathroom, the question an echo from the othernight.
“It wasn’t. Not atall.”
“I don’t believeyou.”
“You’ve got more courage than me. I guess that’s what itis.”
“I have more courage than you? The guy who never leaves his house is more courageous than the schoolteacher running for citycouncil?”
“You’re blind,Zach.”
Great. Now she’s using the blind card as an excuse for the way I live my life. I love her for it, but I can’t let her doit.
“You saying you’ve never seen a blind person out in theworld?”
“I have,but—”
“I was blinded in a car accident, okay? A trick of fate that took my parents and left me without one of my senses. I’ve adapted. But look at me. I can’t even make myself leave my house. You’re the one who’s brave, Veronica. You’re willing to get out there and fight, while I do everything from here.Hiding.”
“I don’t feel brave.” She wrapped an arm around my chest and gave me some of herwarmth.
“Why’d you run? I mean you explained who you’re fighting for, but what was the last straw? Or was it a gradualthing?”
“It was gradual, I guess. And thensudden.”
“Oh, that clears itup.”
I loved the light smack she gave my arm before kissingit.
“It was the library,” she finally said. “Library and lunch, in the sameday.”
“What do youmean?”
“They proposed to cut funding for both the school library and the city branch,downtown.”
“I had no idea.” If I’d known, I might’ve done something. Or maybe not. I was always connected, but my world was way outside of this place. It was starting to sound like I should have been paying attention to things closer tohome.
“Well, you wouldn’t. It doesn’t exactly make headlines with all the crap happening around us nowadays. But these little things matter, you know? There are folks who wouldn’t read a book if not for the library. It’s a place to learn, to congregate. It’s shelter and warmth for some. I grew up hoarding library books. We couldn’t afford to buy books, but Iread.”
“What about thelunches?”
“The policy in our school system has always been to let kids accrue debt as the year goes on. We’d never turn away a kid who couldn’t afford to pay. And it’s a buck freaking fifty, you know?” An ache started up in my chest at the emotion in her voice. “If a family can’t afford to send their babies to school with that much cash—even when they’re already on a reduced lunch program—how can they possibly get them clothes or books, for heaven’s sake? So, our fiscally conservative school board has voted to make those kids pay, starting next year. Can you picture the embarrassment? You’re ten years old and you get to the register and Nana Schwartz has to shake her head no, that you can’t have that crappy slice of pizza and carton of milk? Every kid will see you’re one of the poor ones? And what if it’s the only food you’re getting allday?”
I was stroking her, not interrupting or making any noise, just giving her what comfort Icould.
