He cared that she would have been hurt.
“What was the plan?” he demanded, jabbing a finger in the direction of the door. He knew he was using hisscary big brother voice,as Adriana liked to say, but he couldn’t stop it. “Were you gonna run out into the desert and hitchhike your way to the nearest town? Maybe put that gun to my head and tell me to let you go? Gods, Carmine, do you have any idea what could happen to you out there? What could happen if you misfired a bolt gun?”
His skin crawled. It was like fire ants had replaced the blood in his veins.Carmine in a stranger’s car, no money, no phone, no one to help her. Carmine lost in the desert as sunrise approaches. Carmine being chased down by that pack of coyotes, her bare feet shredded by the rough ground. Carmine stumbling across an unexploded bomb left by the war. One wrong step and— gone.
Still, she said nothing. Her expression was rigid, but her eyes were so big, so bright and wary. He couldn’t decide if he wanted to crush her to his chest or channel Harlan and give her a scolding so blistering, she’d never fucking forget it.
He nearly gave in to the impulse to do one or the other, but managed to restrain himself at the last second.I’m scaring her. Fuck. I know better than that.
His sister was so, so sensitive growing up. All it took was a single annoyed look and she’d burst into tears, run off, and find some small place to hide until he or Harlan coaxed her out again. He knew better than to let his temper get the better of him.
Forcing himself to swallow the lump of fear in his throat, he let out a slow breath. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have— You scared me and I reacted badly.”
Her expression didn’t change one iota. It was like she was bracing herself for something. More anger? Atticus skimmed his hand up her spine and was a little startled to feel the bumps — not just of her vertebrae, but her ribs, too.Did they not fucking feed her?
Venom neutral vampires who didn’t get the right nutrition could easily get underweight. Bad synth and irregular feeding could snowball and become devastating. Vampires were already at a disadvantage, since their diet was so lean in fat, but venom neutral vampires were even more at risk. They couldn’t miss out on anything. And now that he was really paying attention, he thought her body temperature was low, too. That was a bad sign.
Still, she said nothing. She wouldn’t stop staring at him. It drove him a little crazy.
“Hey,” he muttered, at a loss. Atticus knew he didn’t have the right, but she was so stiff, so cold, and his words didn’t seem to be doing much, so he cupped the side of her head and gently coaxed her to lean into him.
His lust hadn’t gone away. His cock was hard behind his fly, his blood was hot, and her sweet cherry scent made the roots of his fangs ache like a motherfucker, but none of that mattered so he ignored it. He could make out the erratic beat of her heart. The sound made some unknown organ in his chest go so tight, it squeezed the breath out of him.
“I’m sorry. I understand why you feel like you need to run. I get it. I really,reallydo. But you scared me and that made me upset. I’m not angry at you, okay? You’re not in trouble.”
It’d been a long damn time since he held a woman this way. He’d forgotten how much he liked it until soft fingers fiddled with a fold of his shirt and warm breath tickled his ear.
Stroking his fingers through her hair, he continued, “I just need you to understand what could have happened. Even if you’d gotten away, even if you’d gotten my gun —bigif — there’snothing within a hundred miles of us right now. You probably would have gotten turned around in the desert. You might have hit another road, but any kind of person could have picked you up. It’s not safe, doll.”
He didn’t expect her to speak. He loved the sound of her soft soprano voice, but he’d quickly picked up that she used her eyes to do the real talking. When she was really unsure, she kept that pretty voice locked away.
It felt like a bit of a gift when she said, in a surprisingly frank tone, “It’s dark now.”
“Yeah, but it won’t be forever. Do you think you could walk a hundred miles in one night? And do you even know how to shoot a gun?”
There was a thoughtful pause, then an almost imperceptible sigh. “No.”
“Right.”
She lapsed into silence, her chin jutting at a stubborn angle. He liked that tiny, almost imperceptible hint of sass. It reminded him that though she might look like a doll, she was the same woman who’d fought like a wild thing in the dirt and didn’t hesitate to go for his gun when she had the chance.
Atticus knew he had to move. She needed to drink — a painful pulse in the roof of his mouth reminded him that theybothneeded to drink — and he needed to figure out what they were going to do. Junger would die, obviously, but his first priority was getting Carmine squared away. She had to be somewhere safe, with people he could trust to look after her.
A deep, dark wave of feeling washed through him, churning his insides until everything felt raw and unfamiliar.Can I trust anyone?
His arm tightened around her middle. The thought of leaving her alone with anyone but him made the tendons of hisneck strain against his skin. He hated the idea. If something happened to her when he wasn’t around, he’d…
What?
Atticus gave himself a hard internal shake. He had to get a grip. This whole thing had fucked with his head and he wasn’t thinking clearly.
I need to call the boss.
He hated to involve Harlan, but his father would know what to do. He’d make the right call. He always did.
The thought made him feel better. Atticus could handle himself, but he didn’t have to. Harlan and the rest of the men who’d followed him out of syndicate life would have his back.
And now they’d have Carmine’s, too, even if she didn’t know it.
