Probably less.
“Oh-kay,” she replied, drawing out the syllables slowly. “And what does that mean for you? Like, how is it different than just a bed?”
“It’s… It’s complicated.” Afraid that he was going to do something stupid if he didn’t put some space between them while he explained, Clark gently untangled their fingers and set about clearing the table. “The nest is partially a cultural thing. It’s considered the ultimate private space. You can’t just look into or, gods forbid,touchanother person’s nest. It’s sacred.”
Stacking their plates and cups, he carefully walked them into the kitchen and deposited them into the sink. “But it’s not just that. Some of it is a… I don’t know the right word, but it’s an evolutionary thing, I think. Orcs lived in caves and underground for thousands and thousands of years. We’re hardwired to like small, dark, windowless spaces. They make us feel safe.”
He could feel her coming up behind him. Her sweet, sugary scent clawed at him, demanding her turn around. When she reached around him to place their silverware into the sink, he held his breath.
She stepped back again. “So when you find your mate…”
He exhaled in a rush. “All beings who take mates go a little crazy, I think, but orcs in particular get sort of… we don’t like having our mates exposed. It feels threatening. We need to have them in the nest to keep them safe and warm and…”Drunk on sex and smeared with come.He cleared his throat. “It’s instinct. You ever wonder why orcs are infamous for mate snatching? That’s the reason.”
Gentle fingers settled tentatively on the small of his back. “So you’re telling me that you’re edgy because I’m not in the bed— nest?”
It was a massive simplification of the intricate, messy process of mating, but it worked. “Yes,” he answered, turning slowly to look down at her.
Nelly lowered her arm. Her fingers knotted in front of her, twisting and twisting as she looked up at him thoughtfully. Slowly, she said, “And the storm feels threatening, which is making the compulsion worse.”
He scrubbed at the stubble on his jaw. It bothered him that they weren’t in the nest. It bothered him that itbotheredhim. He hated feeling like he wasn’t in control of himself, not because he didn’t want to let loose with his mate and get drunk on her, but because the idea of Nelly being uncomfortable twisted him up inside.
It was imperative that she feel safe with him, not pressured into anything she wasn’t ready for. No matter what his instincts screamed, it washisjob to keep his shit in check, not hers.
“Don’t worry about me, sugar,” he said, summoning a smile. He hated what he was about to say, but it was necessary. “Maybe you should just hustle off to bed while I clean things up. It’ll make me feel better knowing you’re all cozy.”
Did he feel a little ill at the thought of not being in the same room as her? Yes. Did he want to stay up late watching holiday movies with her, wrapped up in blankets, until she dozed off in his arms? Also yes. Did he have fantasies of carrying her back to the nest and crawling in beside her as the blizzard howled outside? Absolutely.
But he didn’t trust himself to do any of that without crossing her clear boundaries, and he feared that the longer he stayed in her immediate vicinity, the harder it would be to keep himself in check.
At least knowing she was in her nest at all would be some relief.Maybe.
He saw the moment what he wasn’t saying clicked for her. Nelly glanced over her shoulder at the living room. “Are you planning on sleeping in there?”
He managed to quickly conceal a grimace. “Yes.”
“You won’t fit on the couch, Clark.”
“I did just fine on the floor last night.” He shrugged. “I’ve slept in rain and snow before, sugar. I promise your floor isn’t worse than that.”
Nelly frowned at him. Propping her hands on the sweet curve of her hips, she replied, “No, Clark. Why don’t you just sleep in the bed with me?”
Need rippled down his spine in an electric wave. Despite his best efforts, his voice dropped to a husky purr when he replied, “That’s not a good idea.”
“Why?”
“Because you don’t like people touching your stuff and that’ll be hard to do when I’m naked in your nest.”
She flushed. “Why do you need to be naked?”
Clark tilted his head to one side and massaged the back of his neck.Whoops.“I normally sleep naked.” It wasn’t quite a lie. It just wasn’t why he imagined himself naked in her nest and they both knew it.
It was a curious thing, watching Nelly’s face get redder like that. For someone so practical and self-confident, it was endearing to discover she was also shy about something as natural as nudity. His mate was full of little contradictions.Fascinating.
“If I slept alone, would youreallyfeel better, or are you just saying that because you’re worried about pushing me?”
Clark pursed his lips. Only an idiot outright lied to their mate and he was dangerously close to claiming that title already. He didn’t want to fuck up worse than he already had.
Squeezing the tense muscles at the back of his neck, he muttered, “Bit of both.”
