“Well, we ask each other questions. We spend time together. It’s not as intimidating as it sounds, I promise.”
“Okay,” I say, while clearing my throat. “Why did you fly alone to Philadelphia?”
Her eyes cast down as she rubs her fingers over the blanket I gave her.
“We don’t have to talk about it,” I say, wondering if that’s not the kind of question I should’ve asked. Maybe I should have asked her favorite color.
“No, it’s okay. My last—exes, they were adamant about not bonding. We’d been together for two years and I woke up one morning and wondered what happened to the girl I was? Ya know? Like how did I lose so much of myself and not realize it? How had I let these Alphas disrespect me in private and public and never stand up for myself? I’m not timid, I’m not weak, but they made me act that way and I hated it. So I marched into their rehearsal and gave them an ultimatum, which in the grand scheme of things was stupid. I knew they weren’t going to choose me.”
I grab her hand and rub my thumb along her wrist as she continues. “I asked them to bond, or I was leaving, and they said they couldn’t offer me a bond. It wouldn’t be a good career move, but it was obviously more than that. I’m sure they cheated when they were on the road. I’d scent different Betas on them, but I ignored it. I just wanted a pack so bad. They were kind at first and offered me a lifestyle that was hard to refuse. When they told me they couldn’t bond, I didn’t want to use their credit card again, and I booked the cheapest and quickest direct I could to fly home.”
“They didn’t even offer to travel with you?”
“No. Which I was really bitter about, but it kinda feels like it’s meant to be, don’t you think?” she asks, looking at me so hopefully and I nod my head. “What about you? Why didn’t you like any of the Omegas Jonah tried to set you up with?”
My eyes search hers. “Are you mad at him for that?”
“No,” she says, and I arch a brow. “Maybe a little, but I can’t worry about the past. Also I won,” she says with a wink.
“I’m not sure. So many of them were society girls. They came from‘good’ families, always trying to be perfect, what a pack would want. It all felt fake and forced in a way I didn’t understand.”
“You don’t come from a‘good’family?” she questions, both of us emphasizing how stupid the word is. Just because you have money and live a certain affluence doesn’t make you better than anyone else.
Don’t get me wrong, I think it helps with your overall happiness, but there’s so much money can’t buy.
I clear my throat. “Our mom passed when I was really little. I don’t have any memories of her, just memories Cole tells me. Our father was a piece of shit Alpha. She couldn’t take it anymore, and so Cole and I were left to deal with him. He was a hard man, and it was easier to stay out of his way.”
I push a piece of hair off her face and she seems to preen under my touch. “Cole left for the Air Force when he was eighteen and I was left alone with him. I don’t blame Cole. If he hadn’t joined, I can only imagine the person he would have become. But that meant a lot of years with just me and our father. I spent a lot of time in my room, not being seen or heard. I think…what happened to our mom is why Cole and I have been so reserved about having an Omega.”
Shiloh swallows thickly. “Your mom was an Omega?”
I wonder how much I should divulge and how pissed Cole will be. It’s his story too.
“She was. I promise, Shiloh, I would never ever fucking hurt you,” I tell her.
Her eyes widen. “Did he do that to you, to your mom?”
I give her a sharp nod and I expect her to run off and tell me she needs some space. Instead she shifts so that her head is on my chest and she’s squeezing my side for dear life.
“I’m so sorry, Mack.”
I clear my throat, not knowing how to feel or what I’m currently feeling, instead I hold her back.
“What about your family?”
She shrugs. “My parents weren’t around much. My Gran is the best mother-figure I know. She was very loving and considerate. She might have been the oldest person in the PTA and on the playground, but she always supported me. She always loved me.”
I kiss the top of her head, not knowing what to say. Your parents are selfish fucks? Your Gran kind of scares me?
“How did you all wind up becoming a pack?” she asks, filling the silence.
“Cole and Jonah became best friends; they pick on each other a lot, but they made sense. They weren’t far off in age and Jonah was younger then. I don’t think Cole really thought much about having an Omega, and at the time Jonah wasn’t either. He wanted to do well taking care of his dads company and Cole wanted to be a commercial pilot. Honestly, it would’ve been easier if I wasn’t in the pack, but Cole wouldn’t leave me behind. I think he felt like he owed me for leaving me with our dad. I didn’t blame him, I still don’t, but I think a part of me knew if I didn’t join a pack with them I never would, so I agreed.”
Her eyes stay focused on me, her brows slightly furrowed.
“Sounds a bit dysfunctional.”
I laugh and nod. “Yeah, before you came here we were pretty much living separate lives, having the occasional dinners together. I’m happy you're here,” I say genuinely.
