I’m so over the hockey news being about this stupid redhead and this subpar team.
They’ll break up eventually.
No bond, no pack contract, no dice.
All the stupid comments from people who don’t know me have tears running down my eyes. Part of me wants to put them all in their place. But both Bram and Max’s PR firm have told them to keep their mouth shut until we sign a pack contract.
A pack contract that could take months from now because I can’t get a clear answer on if bonding while pregnant is safe or not. Not to mention, I don’t want them to feel what I’m going through right now. There’s no way I could burden someone with all of these feelings.
I could ask Piper, but what if she slips up and tells Owen before I get a chance to tell Max? Not that I think she’d do that, but it could happen. All the things I search online are conflicting,some saying it's safe to bond, others saying they miscarried after bonding, though none of those are on medical sites. It’s just too much information, and I don’t know what to do.
My hands shake as I put the phone down. I’m crippled by fear, and I don’t know what to do.
I’m scared I’m going to lose my pack because of some crazy accident. I’m afraid of losing them because the media is tearing us apart. I miss my family, and I don’t know how to make it better.
I’m fucking scared of everything.
So I do what I do best. I disassociate and crawl back into bed and act like I wasn’t crying in a closet.
It will be okay. I’ll be okay… I think.
CHAPTER 38
Finally, after weeks of recovery, weeks I didn’t even fucking need, I’m about to be back on the ice.
Minus some headaches and the time it took my bruises to heal, I’ve been more than ready to get back to work. I know I’m about to wake before my alarm, but when I turn over, Sloane is nowhere to be found.
I pull back the covers and hear her retching before I push the bathroom door open. I pull back her wild hair and hold it as she pukes while I rub her back with my other hand.
“What’s wrong? Did you eat something bad?”
She doesn’t answer as she just throws up more.
“Should I postpone practice? I can wait to go back.”
Sloane shakes her head, and I realize I’m being annoying by asking her questions while she’s sick.
It probably shouldn’t be while she’s throwing her guts up that I wish I were bonded to her, but it is.
We agreed to wait till I was cleared and healthy; I was shocked Sloane was okay with waiting. If I’m being honest, she hasn’t been the same since the accident. She seems a lot more cautious about everything and hasn’t left the house much.
She grabs a bundle of toilet paper and cleans her face and flushes, and I let her hair go free.
“No, go to work. I must have eaten something that didn’t agree with me. I’ll be okay. Plus, Ethan will be home.”
“I don’t like it,” I say, and she gives me a watery smile.
“Seriously, go do what you love. I’ll be here waiting.”
“I love you more than hockey. You know this?”
“Yes, I know this,” she says, tapping my thigh. “Your bruises are completely gone, you’ve been medically cleared, and the team needs you. I’ll be fine, I promise. Go to work.”
“Are you just tired of watching TV with me all day?”
“No, and I promise I won’t watch anyPack Islandwithout you.”
“You better not. I need to know if Lyrik is going to stay and make things work with Remy and Cass or if she’s going to fly back home.”
