I’m between Max and Ethan while Bram sleeps on the couch.
It’s not easy, but thankfully, everyone is too exhausted to notice as I slink out of the bed and make my way to the bathroom. I turn the shower to hotter than hell and sit on the shower floor and let the spray hit me.
The tears flow out of me so violently I can’t make myself stop crying. My stomach lurches, but there’s nothing. My stomach is too empty.
I’m not even sure exactly what is upsetting me the most. It’s just too much. Everything is so overwhelming. My body aches, I’m exhausted, and my heart hurts.
I remember Bram’s hurt face when he walked in on me and Max. I never even got Max’s true consent to be in my heat. I’m sure he signed the form, but it was probably out of obligation. Then there’s Ethan. I remember bits and pieces of his background, but it’s so jumbled up. All I can really recall is that he came from an abusive household.
Maybe the more time that passes, the more will come to me.
I feel lost, so fucking lost.
Where do we go from here? Did Bram just join my heat because he knew I couldn’t do it without him? Is he going to stay with me? How is Max handling having a scent match?
The only person I don’t have to worry about is Ethan, and that’s where I find some comfort. He’s not going anywhere, he told me in those literal terms.
I’m trying to breathe and calm myself when I hear the door open. Immediately from his scent, I know it’s Bram.
Fear laces through me, and I start sobbing again. My stomach muscles are cramping so badly, but I can’t calm down.
He turns the water to a more tolerable temperature and steps behind me, cradling me from behind.
For the first time since my heat started, or at least that I can recall, his chest rumbles with a purr, which doesn’t help my crying situation one bit.
“Don’t cry, little Omega. Tell me what’s wrong.”
I’m trying to talk, but it’s too fucking hard. Instead, I turn around and wrap my arms around his massive form.
“I—I love you. Please don’t leave me,” I cry out, and his arms tighten around me so fiercely I feel like he may break me in half.
“I love you too, Sloane. I’m not going anywhere.”
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for any of it to happen this way. Oh, god. How many games have you missed? Is my dad upset? Are you okay? I know you and Max don’t get along. I know you two fought. I’m so sorry.”
“Shhh. You already apologized, and you have nothing to be sorry for. We’re working on things. Our relationship with one another isn’t your responsibility. We missed two games. The Foxes still won, and right now there’s a whole subreddit about where the fuck Finnegan the Fox is. Apparently, someone noticed the lack of social media posts and Gagnon playing as well.”
“Oh, well, that will be good for social media,” I sniff, and Bram laughs.
Between his purring and his laughter, I’m jostled ever so slightly. I never want to leave his arms. I feel safe and whole.
Staying in this shower forever seems like an awesome idea. Because reality is going to be difficult.
“While you’re crying probably isn’t the best time to ask this,” he says, and I pull back and look at him.
His beard is growing long, and I can’t help but to drag my fingers through it.
“What?”
“I’d like for you and Ethan to move in with me,” he says.
I swallow thickly. Max’s name was clearly not mentioned, and honestly, this is a loaded question when I’m trying to pull myself together.
“Don’t answer. Just think about it. I know you like planning. Make a pros and cons list, and let me know what concerns you.”
Instead of listing off the tons of things that concern me, mainly how comfortable my scent match would be coming over to Bram’s home, instead, I just rest my face against his rumbling chest.
The gentle hum of his purr is the only thing keeping me grounded at this moment.
