“I think her ego is fine where it is.”
“You’re probably right.”
He kisses my shoulder again and sits down in his chair.
“Did Candy come this morning?” he asks, looking around for something.
“No, probably had her own bout of fun last night.”
“You’re probably right. She usually brings me the paper.”
Suddenly, I feel it. The pull to take care of a soul.
“Fuck, I’ve got to go,” I say, leaning down and giving him a kiss. I snap my fingers and a robe dons my mostly naked form. “Tell Ladybird I’ll be back later.”
“Have a good day,” he says, looking me up and down before I pop myself to Earth.
It’s an unfortunate tugboat incident. Other reapers are there, all looking worse for wear. I suppose we all had busy nights last night.
Along with a few other reapers I know, Death is talking to a soul, convincing them to join the afterlife, so I get right back to work.
For the first time in my many years as a reaper, I feel more while I work.
What in the hell have these cupids done to me? And why don’t I hate it?
It takes a few hours to convince all the souls to leave the scene with us, and we’re pleased when all of them agree, none of them taking the option of becoming a ghost.
“Did you and Love have fun last night?”
“Yeah, after we left the event,” Death says and I shake my head.
“You’re so lucky Love is into your broodiness,” I reply, and he smiles menacingly at me.
“I am, aren’t I? Come on, she said she made special muffins this morning to celebrate so many successful love matches. You need to come and act like they taste good,” he says, and I give him a nod.
We head to purgatory, and go to our shared break room space. As soon as Love sees me, her eyes go wide, and she’s sitting me down in a chair and plying me with snacks.
“Love, is everything good?” I ask, and she clears her throat.
“Everything is fantastic. Amazing, really. Why would anything be wrong? We just had so much fun. You met your matches, and so did so many other beings. Oh, did Candy hook up with Mortem?” she asks.
I know when Love gets a little chatty that the tiny cupid is keeping a secret.
I take a bite of her muffin, which tastes like pink dirt. Death stares at me, and I swallow, even though it’s dry and disgusting.
“You’re speaking in run-on sentences. You always do that when something’s gone wrong.”
“No, I don’t. I just simply love to talk. It’s a very cupid trait to be a little chatty. I mean you should know, you’re happily with two cupids. There’s nothing, like say, a really stupid news article that could ruin that. Ya know? Who gives a flying fuck what Harmony Lindt thinks?” She says it all so fast I can only catch some words.
“An article?”
“Seriously, Gloom. It’s stupid. Harmony is a huge, jealous, fascist cunt.”
I click my tongue on the roof of my mouth. “Let me see it, Love.”
She bites her lip and shakes her head back and forth. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. I think we just let this blow over, really.”
“Love, let me see it.”
