“No, mostly fucking the women in front of their husband or partner. I have been touched by a man before, but I firmly enjoy women.”
“That’s not something you’d want to do with me, right?” I ask, unsure. Sharing is not something I want. I want someone solely dedicated to me. I’m a greedy, selfish girl, and I openly admit that.
“Fuck no. I’ve never shared when I’ve been dedicated to a person and it’s not something I need. It’s mostly who was available at Avalon.”
I nod and appreciate his honesty. A lot of men wouldn’t be so forthcoming with the information he’s telling me.
“So, you’ve never brought a girlfriend to Avalon before?”
“No.”
“And you haven’t really done the things you like at Avalon outside of the club?”
“Not really, no.”
“But you’d like to?”
“Yeah, I’d like to have it all. Even if it makes me a selfish asshole. I’m still grappling with how exactly Collin would feel about this. But, I feel like finding out what could be between us outweighs any guilt I have over that.”
I swallow, holding back what I want to ask for. I’ve basically resigned myself to not even bringing it up. I don’t need to call him daddy. He doesn’t need to be that, I can live without it. He’s already feeling guilty for being close to my biological father, adding that into the mix could fuck it all up.
If he can give me everything else except that title, I’d be happy, happier than I ever was with Sean. Aiden looks at me like I’m special, and it seems like our interests align. It’s also so fucking nice to be spoken to as an equal, not like I’m lesser than in the partnership. It’s become more and more clear that I still have a lot to learn about what a good dominant truly is.
“What labels would make you feel comfortable moving forward?” he asks, and I know I should just blurt it out, but I don’t.
“I think just saying we’re exclusive, not seeing anyone else and learning one another is enough.”
“Is that really enough for you?” he asks with an arch of his brow.
“What do you mean?”
He shakes his head and looks out to the beach. You can see a little sliver of the water from here. “That night I dropped you off, you said something, and I wasn’t sure if I should bring it up.”
My heart is racing out of my chest and if my stomach hurt earlier, it feels like battery acid is in it now.
“Oh?” I ask, hoping that he will spell it out for me.
“You said daddy, and I know you definitely weren’t referencing your absent father.”
When did it get so unbearably hot outside? It feels like my skin is on fire, and I just want to jump out of it.
I clear my throat and I want to yank my hand away from his, but I don’t. I use it as a grounding point and stare at our combined hands as I speak. “I called Sean that. I like it and what it symbolizes in a dynamic, but it’s not something I need.”
“But you enjoy it?” His tone is far from judgmental, if anything just pure curiosity. I look up and his green eyes look so soft and captivating as I respond.
“I do enjoy it.”
“I’ve never been called that before, but I think I’d like to see how I like it. What are the things you like most about it?” He’s not laughing at me or judging. If anything, he’s going out of his way to understand what I like and need. Was Aiden created in a lab? Because I don’t think any man should be this perfect.
He squeezes my hand, and I smile looking down at our hands and looking back up to him. “I’m not into age play if that’s a concern, not that I would ever yuck anyone’s yum, it’s just not for me. For me, it’s a matter of security and you being my person, knowing that you’ll take care of me and make sure I’m safe. I guess it’s pretty cliché considering how I was raised. They say you want whatever you didn’t have as a—”
“Baby, I didn’t ask you to psychoanalyze yourself, I just want to know what you would want from me and what would make you happy.”
I blink at him. The term baby sliding off his tongue so easily makes me wet. “I like it when you make choices, when you take control, when you tell me what to do. I’m also a very affectionate person, and I need an annoying amount of attention.”
“I can do that.”
“You can do that?” I parrot and he nods his head. “And what do you like?”
