“They aren’t our alphas anymore,” he said, his icy tone cutting the air. “They stopped being our alphas the moment they made us wait at the restaurant. And every single piece of bullshit that came after that.”
The madness in his eyes struck me deep, and the tightness in his body reverberated through mine.
“We can’t be around alphas like that, Brandy. We’re not safe there. If they were really our alphas, they wouldn’t keep hurting us. We deserve better than this, Brandy. And I can’t fucking believe it took you coming into our lives to make me realise that.”
He drew a shuddering breath as he spun the wheel and took us into a side street.
“They haven’t changed for you, not like I have. They don’t understand how important you are. They can’t love you like I do, and I won’t let them take you away.”
But Caspian had changed. It was so obvious from the moment we shared a bite that he wasn’t the same man from the heat suite.
Maybe I couldn’t completely tell if Sin had changed, because he kept so much of himself hidden. But Kai hadn’t seen the way sobs poured from him when Caspian and I first opened our eyes.
Of course, Kai had changed, and I loved him so much for it. So why couldn’t he see that his alphas had as well?
“Running away isn’t the answer here, Kai. We can talk about it. We have been talking about it, haven’t we?”
Kai shook his head. “I’m not going back to a pack where all we get is anger and silence,” he said, echoing the words I’d said at the restaurant.
“But it’s not like that anymore. I thought it had changed since the restaurant.”
“That’s just Caspian fucking with your mind! Why do you think things are ever going to change? I’ve had five years of this shit, Brandy. They are going to keep dragging you back in, and you’ll never escape from them. That’s why we have to do this now.”
But that was his life, and his experience.
Knowing I was loved helped me rediscover a part of myself I was convinced I had lost. But Kai wasn’t the only one who brought that out in me. Sin was the first of them that breathed life into me with his gentle looks, and Caspian made me feel like the sexiest woman in the world, desperate to fuck me, no matter how much he hated it.
I didn’t want to give up on them.
“There’s always time to change, Kai. Why can’t we give them another chance?”
“They left you there to die!” he hissed. “They fucking abandoned you, and you couldn’t fight back because Caspian tore into your fucking throat when he was in a rage.”
I went quiet, my head dipping, clenching my hands together as I forced myself to stay calm. Everything had been a blur because my obsession with Caspian had drowned me, so I couldn’t remember everything I’d said during it. But it was obvious I hadn’t told Kai the most important thing.
“I was the one who asked him to bite me. I started it all—it was my fault.” I lifted my head to meet him with a glare, because if he had torn me away from them because of that…
He shuddered, and the car jumped as he slammed to a halt at a junction. Two cars zipped in front of us as Kai drew in a harsh breath and waited for the road to clear.
“What?” he asked darkly. “What did you say?”
“I’m the reason Zania attacked us. I wanted to get back at her, so I told Caspian to bite me.”
Kai’s eyes were wide as he stared at the road, leaning forward against the steering wheel. The engine revved as we took off again.
His hands tightened, and he kept his gaze ahead. He was silent for too long, and it couldn’t just be disbelief shaking him.
“It doesn’t matter. We’re still leaving.”
“Would you have acted differently in that situation? Where Zania pushed me to a point where I couldn’t take it anymore? I’m not like you, Kai. No matter how strong you say I am, I couldn’t bear it anymore. I wasn’t just angry. Biting Caspian gave me a better chance at staying safe from her. I just never realised she would hurt him as well.”
“I can keep you safe!” he shouted. “I’m better than them because I won’t hurt you! I won’t fuck up your life like they have!I’mthe one who loves you, Brandy. Not them!”
I swallowed my frustration because giving in to it now would make it even harder to talk to him.
“I love you too, Kai. I really do, but I don’t want to leave. I thought we were going to spend the rest of our lives curled up in our nest, where we don’t have to worry about anything else because Zania is gone?”
He stilled, and the whirlwind of emotions inside him raged more strongly. “No. We’ll find somewhere new. I’ll make us somewhere better than this. Then we won’t have to hurt anymore.”
