My name in his voice.
Pressure built behind my lids. I pressed my palm to his sternum, felt his pulse hammering. “Keep going. Try something else.”
His brow furrowed in concentration. Lips formed shapes. Testing.
“I...” He managed. Then choked on the next word. His hand flew to his throat.
“Slow. Don’t force it.”
He tried anyway. Stubborn bastard.
“I... w-want...” His voice cracked. Dissolved into coughing that made him double over.
I rubbed his back. Felt the muscles spasm under my palm. “Easy. Breathe.”
The coughing fit lasted thirty seconds. When it finally subsided, Xavier straightened slowly. His hand still pressed to his throat. Watering.
Frustrated. Furious at his own body’s betrayal.
I cupped his jaw. Made him look at me. “Hey. This is huge. You couldn’t speak at all yesterday. Now you can say words. Plural.”
He grabbed the notepad from my other hand. Scribbled: Not enough.
“It’s more than we had.” I traced my thumb along his cheekbone. “Your vocal cords are loosening. That’s a major improvement.”
Xavier’s jaw tightened. He wrote again: Need to warn you. Tell you things. Can’t do that one word at a time.
The desperation there made my throat ache.
“You will. Just... be patient. Let your throat recover between attempts. Don’t push so hard you damage something.”
He looked like he wanted to argue. Opened his mouth. Closed it. Finally nodded.
Smart man.
Xavier settled onto the stump Havoc had vacated. Pulled me between his knees. His arms came around my waist, chin resting on my shoulder.
Warm. Solid. Real.
I leaned back against him. Let myself have this moment. This brief peace before reality crashed back in.
“Headache bad?” I asked quietly.
He held up four fingers against my stomach.
Scale of one to ten. The usual average.
“Any nausea? Dizziness? Visual disturbances?”
He shook his head.
“Good. That’s good.” I covered his fingers with mine. “We need to be careful, though. The symptoms will get worse. Hellhound warned us, seizures, cognitive breaks, violent dissociation.”
Xavier’s arms tightened.
“I’m not going anywhere. I just need you to understand that if you hurt me during an episode, I won’t hold it against you. You won’t be in control. It won’t be your fault.”
He pulled back. Turned me to face him. Determination burned there, fierce and desperate.
