“The vote needed to be unanimous to bypass Merrick as the tiebreaker, and I was the only one the other Sentinels could agree on. Given the alternative…” He turned a weary smile in my direction. “It was really no choice at all. I accepted. Merrick was livid, but there was nothing he could do. He’d been outvoted, and he didn’t have enough support to overrule us. Everyone was ready to see things go back to how they were before your father took over, and that couldn’t happen with Merrick at the helm.”
His smile was weak. “Would have been better if you’d been here. You’d have gotten all four of our votes to succeed your father.”
The thought of taking over in my father’s stead made me nauseous. Giving up my right hand to the Vessel, losing my ability to practice my trade or make a living for myself outside of these walls, and damning myself to the service of a god I despised was a terrifying notion. Faced with the choice Levitt had been, I would have been cornered into the same resignation. Anything to keep Merrick from taking over and continuing the barbaric practices that had become the hallmarks of my father’s reign.
“You were always the better choice between us,” I said. “Though I do wonder why you keep Merrick as yourShroud Warden knowing he doesn’t support your vision and likely wants your position for himself.”
Levitt waved away the concern. “He hasn’t made any moves against me. Though, he does grumble behind my back. I hear more than he knows.” He chuckled. “But I’ve no valid reason to remove him at this point. Should he give me a reason in the future, I’ll pursue it. In the meantime, I suffer his input and mitigate his extremism the best I can.”
“I suppose that’s the best we can hope for,” I said.
Levitt nodded. “Thank you for coming to me with this. If I’d known ahead of time they were brothers, I might have been concerned Penny was here to further Merrick’s agenda. Given what you’ve told me about their less than favorable relationship, I will rest a little easier.”
I couldn’t help a chuckle of my own. “There’s no chance of Penny backing anything Merrick believes in. I will personally guarantee that.”
Levitt’s bright smile was back. “Good. And please let me know if there are any further incidents so I can address them. For now, I’m going to give Merrick some time to come clean about the farm and his family. However long that takes will be telling.”
“I appreciate you taking this seriously. I want to believe my recruit will be safe here, but I worry about the threat Merrick may pose. I feel better knowing you’re aware of this before he can try to twist things to suit his own plans.” I got to my feet, and Levitt stood as well. “Considering he was close to my father, I suspect his ire will fall on me too, as much because I brought Penny in as for my supposed disrespect for my lineage.”
“You’ve always been above reproach,” Levitt said. “If you maintain that, he won’t have anything to use against you.”
“Thank you, Lev. That means a lot to me.”
He grinned. “What are friends for?”
As he saw me out, guilt stuck in my throat. It shouldn’t have been so easy to manipulate my childhood friend, to twist his trust until it fit my needs. But just like four years ago—when he’d taken a job he never wanted because there’d been no other choice—I had no choices left now. This was the only way to keep Penny safe. To keepmyselfsafe. Better a living liar than an honest dead man.
I drifted through the market, my eyes skimming over the stalls without seeing a thing. I told myself I was trying to settle my thoughts enough to go home and check on Penny, but they wouldn’t be tamed. They tangled and knotted, circling back on themselves until I couldn’t tell where one ended and the next began.
In the grand scheme, my comfort was irrelevant. I’d known from the moment I set foot on this path that it would demand pieces of me I never meant to give. That I’d have to become the villain if I wanted to tear the Bone Men down from the inside. I was no hero. But I was the only one willing to gamble their quiet life staring down a dark god, knowing I wouldn’t walk away unscathed.
If I lost my soul in the process, it was a small price to pay to save the world.
22
Penny
Ididn’t remember moving from the kitchen to the living room floor, so I couldn’t explain it to Kit when he crouched beside me, shaking me so hard it made my insides slosh.
“Penny, what are you doing?” he demanded.
Peeling my eyes open, I found Kit’s face twisted in concern. Hishandsomeface, Rosie had said. Didn’t I know it.
“Are you all right?” Kit asked.
I lay belly down on the wood floor, more aware than ever of the spots I’d missed when sweeping up the place. My cheek was slick with drool and studded with grit as I craned my neck in a tentative move toward sitting.
“I’m fine,” I replied, struggling around a tongue that felt twice its normal size. I tried the words again, rolling them in my mouth like they had a flavor. But I tasted nothing except the whiskey gone sour and making my stomach roll.
Kit’s nose wrinkled as he sat back on his heels. “You’re drunk.”
My head thunked down onto the floorboards, and my temple raked across them as I nodded. “I drunk it all, Kit.”
“Drankit all.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I wasn’t even gone that long.”
I squeezed my eyes shut, relishing the dark quiet behind my closed lids. That was why I got the liquor in the first place. To silence the clamor of my brother’s accusations and my own doubts. I chugged until I couldn’t remember being sad in the first place. But if that was true, where were these tears coming from?
“Let’s get you off the ground, at least,” Kit said.
