He shuddered. Harlow was not inmate material.
Wes sighed. “Killing him won’t get you what you want.”
He stopped pacing and faced him. “And what exactly do I want, doc?”
“Foxx.”
Harlow rolled his eyes. “I already have Foxx. He’s mine.”
“Yours, but going to go on a date with someone else?”
He growled and went back to pacing.
“Harlow, I’ve been trying to avoid being blunt about the subject, but…I feel we are at a point where it would be safer for everyone involved if I just come out and say it. In my professional opinion, you feel something for Foxx.”
He stopped again, eyeing Wes as if he had two heads. “I, what?”
“You are protective. You worry about him…and the idea of someone else touching him makes you murderous. You are attached. Whether that attachment is healthy remains to be seen.”
“Look, I know I’m attached. I’m not quite that dense to not have realized that. But I can’t have feelings…I don’t think I’m…”
“Capable?”
“Yes…”
“You are. Like most disorders, ASPD is a spectrum. But even those on the severe end can form attachments, and as for feelings… You can have them. You’ve proven that already, Harlow.
“Those nightmares were fear driven. You were afraid for Foxx’s life. Afraid of being too late to save him. Each and every step you’ve taken since has been to prevent harm from happening to him. Sure, some of it was you wanting to shut out these new emotions, but we both know that wasn’t the only reason.”
“What does that matter? Let’s say you aren’t wrong. Because maybe you aren’t. Maybe I was afraid! But now what?!” Harlow snapped. “How does knowing that help me when, at most, that emotion was a fucking fluke?!
“Because, do you know what I feel right now?! Murderous! I want to track that bastard down and skin him alive for even thinking he can touch something that is mine! Not someone, something, like Foxx is an object to fucking collect. And I can’t seem to pull back from this. Because even though I know I shouldn’t, I will kill Iggy if he goes near Foxx. I think I may kill anyone who tries.”
Wes stared, his face grim. “Would you kill Foxx?”
He jerked back in shock. “No!” he growled.
“What if he walks away from you?”
Harlow swallowed. “That’s his right.”
“But it’s your right to decide who he can be with?”
“He’s mine…but…I’d never hurt him.”
“What if keeping him from others hurts him?”
“I wouldn’t keep him from his friends… And I know…Foxx doesn’t deserve this, doesn’t deserve to be boxed in by a psycho like me, but I don’t think I can stop myself… I am NOT normal, Wes, and I never have been. So, regardless of you thinking I can feel things, it doesn’t change the situation I’m in.”
“I don’t think, Iknowyou can feel, Harlow,” Wes pressed. “Do you realize how pale you went when I asked if you’d kill Foxx? You care for him. While you may not feel things in the exact same way as someone like myself or Tony feels them, what you do feel is just as real and valid.
“The problem is, when it comes to yourself, you talk in absolutes, Harlow. You have clung to this idea that you are a psychopath, and with that, you have attached many negative and stringent connotations to yourself. But the reality is…there are no absolutes when it comes to the human mind.”
Wes let out a soft laugh. “Or paranormal mind, for that matter. Harlow, I want to help you. And the best way I can help you is if you let me officially try to diagnose you. While no, it won’t fix things, it will help you to better understand yourself without that damn label of psychopath getting in the way.”
“No.”
He didn’t want to know. Because what if Wes was wrong? What if Harlow was right…? What if he couldn’t feel anything? What if all this was…him being obsessed over someone? And then what? What could he even do with that knowledge? How would it help?
