The guy sits beside me. “That sucks. Do you want to talk about it?”
I frown at him. “With a complete stranger? Why would I?”
He shrugs. “We’re at a train station, if you know what I mean. I wouldn’t feel comfortable continuing on my way without making sure you’re okay.”
I frown at him, not understanding at all. Why does it matter that we’re at a train station? I think about it, trying to decipher what he means, and when I do, my eyes widen. Hang on, is he actually worried I’ll jump in front of a train and take my own life?Mon Dieu, just how miserable do I look?
“No, it’s nothing like that!” I say quickly. “I only recently had my heart broken, and I was thinking about leaving the country. I’m definitely not thinking about ending things! Wow...”
“Okay, sorry,” he says quickly. “It’s just, I live close to a busy railway and um... things happen there. So I was worried.”
I shake my head. “I wasn’t thinking about that at all.”
“Okay, good. Sorry,” he says again. “Still, do you want to talk about it? I know a thing or two about broken hearts, and I have some time left before visiting someone. I’m Hugo, by the way.”
He extends his hand, so I shake it briefly. “I’m Luc.” I wasn’t planning to talk to him, or anyone for that matter, but before I’m aware of it, I’m in a conversation with him. I’m not sure why, but he’s just approachable. Very non-threatening.
“Well, if you must know, the guy I want to be with is very different from me,” I tell Hugo. “I knew that from the start, but I still want him. Perhaps even more because of it, but something happened and he hurt me. Perhaps not intentionally, but badly. I’m afraid it’s not going to work.”
Hugo nods. “I can relate. The person I’m visiting in this city is someone I was in love with years ago. I always feared they’d realize we were too different, and the chances of that are even bigger now. They’re a model, you see. And I’m not.”
He looks down at himself, and I’m guessing he’s talking about his plus-size body. I’m at a loss for what to say. I don’t know Hugo, but I think he’s nice, and I don’t want to say anything insulting or perhaps weirdly complimentary. Luckily, he continues, and I don’t have to reply.
“They’re impulsive, passionate, much more adventurous than I am. They have a wild heart, so to speak, and won’t be tempered. Is your guy like that as well?
I sniff softly. “No, quite the opposite, actually. I’m the impulsive one between the two of us.”
“Oh,” Hugo replies, a little taken aback. “Then why did it not work?”
I shrug. “I don’t know, perhaps I scared him off,” I reply, sighing. “I acted impulsively, just like your crush.”
For some time, Hugo remains silent. “Crush ...” he eventually repeats, softly. “Yeah, I suppose you could call them that. Max always had a special place in my heart despite...” He silences himself and shakes his head. “Never mind, not important. Maybe you could um, I don’t know, just spend quality time with your boyfriend. Back in the day, that’s all I wanted with Max, just to be with them, get to know them. But they always wanted to go out and try new things, often something exciting or risky. It made me sad.”
I look away from Hugo, staring into the distance. He has a point, actually. This morning, Cody asked me to have brunch and spend the day with him. That was all he wanted. I’m the one who suggested introducing him to my dad, the one who proposed. I meant for it to be a romantic gesture, but I realize now that wasn’t what Cody was looking for. He only wished to spend time with me and get to know me, the same way Hugo wanted with his person.
“That makes a lot of sense, actually. I think you helped me figure something out.”
Hugo’s face lights up. “Great, that was the whole point. Do you think you and your guy can make it work?”
“I don’t know,” I reply, sighing. It may be that I better understand what Cody wants, but he still said some mean things. He said I used him, and that’s the part that hurts the most.
“What you said helped me understand,” I tell Hugo. “But it doesn’t necessarily mean he and I will get together. Maybe we’re just too different, and too much has happened.”
Hugo nods. “I hope you can work it out. And who knows, maybe Max and I can too. Someday... if they want.” He standsup and sighs. “I’ll leave you to it, then. I don’t want to bother you more than I already did.”
“Thank you. Good luck to you as well. I hope you can still make things right.”
He gives me a slight smile that seems different from his previous ones. Almost a little sad. “We’ll see. Bye, Luc.”
And just as quick as he entered my life, Hugo walks out of it again. Strange how some short, unexpected encounters can have a huge impact on a person.
***
Hugo left several minutes ago. As a result of talking to him, I’ve abandoned the thought of boarding a train and leaving the country. He somehow reminded me that running won’t solve anything; I’d probably feel even more alone than I do now. Just like he did without his crush, whoever that is...
But if I’m not leaving, what will I do? Honestly, I have no idea.
I stay where I am, sitting and thinking on the bench in the hall of the train station. Will Hugo and his crush work out their differences? Will Cody and I? I’m not sure. I don’t even know what I want at this point.
