I blink my eyes open in the darkness, and from the thin strings of light poking through the shutters, I can see the outline of his body, the gentle rise and fall of his chest. He has to trust me so much to let me be this close, to hold him like this.
It’s overwhelming to think about how much he’s giving to just beingherewith me, especially knowing how much he’s been hurt, both in the past and now.
I let my arm tighten around him again, and I close my eyes and settle my cheek against the back of his neck.
“Thankyou,” I whisper on a quiet breath. Then I let the feel of his heart beating under my palm lull me off to sleep.
Chapter Nineteen
Nico
WhenIwakeupSaturday morning, the first thing I feel is him. His hand on my chest, his warm breath on my neck, his leg resting over mine. He’s still holding me just like he was when I fell asleep however-many hours ago that was, and there’s a gentleness to it, a tenderness that I justknowI’m not imagining this time.
I love it.
I lie still, not wanting to wake him. It was one thing to ask him—god, I practically begged him, didn’t I?—when it was the middle of the night. When he rolled over into me and then wrapped me up in his arms, cradling my body in his. It was one thing to ask then, but it’ll be something completely different when he wakes up now, the room bright with the morning’s light, his family showing up early for the weekend-long party.
I can already hear noises from downstairs. Talking and dishes clinking and furniture being moved around. His mom will come up here soon if he’s not awake, reminding him she needs him to help with things. She probably needs my help, too, to set up outside or cook or run to the store.
I don’t realize I’m holding my breath until his hand presses lightly into my chest and then slides downward to my stomach.
“Mmm, Nico . . .”
I figure he’s not really awake fully or he would have pulled away, cursing another apology like he did last night. But that’s not what happens. At all. Instead, he burrows his face into my neck and inhales deeply with another contended hum. His leg straightens just enough that his foot plays with mine for a second, and then he caresses back up my chest with his hand, still pressing lightly into me.
“Did you sleep okay?” he mumbles against me. “What time is it?”
“Dunno,” I answer, too distracted to say much else.
He chuckles, and it’s even more distracting then, feeling his whole body shake with his quiet laugh. “You don’t know if you slept okay, or you don’t know what time it is?” he teases, and then he nuzzles my neck, which sends a jolt of heat through me. I almost moan when he does it again, pulling me back against him more at the same time. “I slept really well,” he murmurs, and his voice becomes a little quieter and deeper when he says, “I hope you did, too.”
Holy fuck, what is all of this?
“I did.”
There’s another chuckle, and he squeezes me gently. “Good.” He hums, and then takes a long, slow breath before pushing himself away with a groan.
I turn over to watch him as he scoots to the edge of the bed, sits, and reaches for his phone.
“Shoot. It’s after eight thirty already,” he says, frowning and running a hand through his hair as he stands up. “Mom’s probably panicking right about now. I think I was supposed to be downstairs to help her like an hour ago.”
He pauses as our eyes meet, and his cheeks flush, a smile teasing at his lips.
God, he’s so fucking adorable.
I purse my lips, knowing I’m taking yet another stupid risk that I probably shouldn’t, and I reach my hand out toward him. “Just five more minutes...?”
Ineedhim to say yes. I don’t even know why. I justneedit. So when his smile softens and he nods, a shiver of relief courses through me, warm and hopeful and something else that feels... good.
His eyes stay on mine as he quietly climbs back into the bed, and then I roll over while he pulls the comforter back up over us, settles down behind me, and wraps one strong arm around my midsection. I whimper, because I guess I love to embarrass the hell out of myself. But he just does that thing where he hums and snuggles in closer, sliding his leg over mine and his hand up my chest.
This isn’t what guys who are just friends do. I’m about ninety-eight percent sure of that. But I also don’t care to worry about what that means right now because, fuck, it’s just so good.
“This is what you wanted?” he says against me, his breath warm on my skin.
“Mm-hmm.”
“’Kay.”
