“Breakfast will be ready when you’re done,” Sam said with a gentle smile.
Ollie nodded, wishing he could feel more enthusiastic. He stood slowly, Sam copying him, and Sam immediately pulled him in for another hug, the embrace comforting and warm, as it always was. Then they parted—Sam heading into the kitchen to get breakfast started, and Ollie heading off to shower and get ready for work.
Chapter 2
When Sam and Ollie left the apartment about two hours later, the sun had edged higher in the sky, and the day’s warmth was no longer just a tease. It was just a short walk to Ollie’s office building—home to Camden Antibody Solutions, the modestly sized biotech company where Ollie had worked for the last six months—but Sam had never been so thankful for the trees lining the path as they walked, providing them enough shade to make the growing heat bearable.
They made most of the walk in silence, and although it wasn’t entirely uncomfortable, Sam felt a knot begin to form in his stomach as they got closer to their destination. They stopped just outside the office building, and Sam glanced at his watch.
“Only seven forty-five. We’re a little early, I think?”
“Yeah. I’ve got about ten minutes before I need to head up,” Ollie said quietly.
Sam nodded and then led them over to a bench about twenty feet from the building’s entrance. They sat, and Sam looped his arm up and around Ollie’s shoulders, pulling him in close.
“Can we just... stay here, like this, for a few minutes?” Sam hated how his voice sounded so uncertain, so clingy. But after the whirlwind of that morning, he wasn’t quite his normal, confident self. Although Ollie had had flashbacks and nightmares before, something about whatever had happened that morning seemed different. And Ollie also seemed different—like he’d pulled away from Sam just a little more, which was something Sam really, really didn’t want to happen.
So when Ollie nodded mutely in response to his question, he tightened his arm around Ollie and brushed a light kiss on his temple. Then he settled his head on top of Ollie’s andmurmured, “Thank you, love.” His heart skipped a beat as Ollie relaxed a tiny bit and leaned his head onto Sam’s shoulder.
Sam closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, taking in the fresh scent of Ollie’s shampoo and the hints of citrus from his aftershave. And he tried his best not to worry. He tried his best to be the solid, strong, gentle presence he knew Ollie needed.
But even as they sat there together, he couldn’t shake the feeling of uncertainty, like the ground was crumbling underneath his feet. And that scared him. A lot.
After a moment, Ollie straightened up and cleared his throat. “What... uh, what time do you go to the office today?”
“They want me in after lunch, like usual. The team is meeting to go over our designs so we can finalize everything and review what we still have left to finish before Wednesday. The meeting’s at, um, one o’clock, I think.”
Ollie fell quiet again but nodded and settled his head back on Sam’s shoulder.
“Ican meet you for lunch. I mean, if you can do an early lunch,” Sam offered, rubbing Ollie’s upper arm gently. “I can bring sandwiches. Or maybe chicken salad and croissants. It should be nice at the park then. And not crowded.”
When Ollie nodded in agreement, Sam breathed a sigh of relief and pressed another kiss to his boyfriend’s temple.
“Eleven thirty, at the park? Will that give you enough time to get to Seattle? With traffic and everything?”
“Yeah, it should,” Sam assured him.
Ollie glanced at his watch again and frowned. “I should get up there. John wanted to go over the data for the experiments I ran yesterday.”
“Of course. Sorry to keep you. I just...”
“I know, Sam. I . . . I’m sorry,” Ollie apologized, pushing himself to his feet. “I keep . . . making things difficult and . . .”
Sam stood and immediately pulled Ollie into another hug, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “I love you, Oll. We both made mistakes this morning. Ishouldn’t have let things go so far that it pushed you to...” He shook his head as he trailed off. Now wasn’t the time or place for this kind of discussion, especially not since Ollie needed to get up to the lab to meet with his boss. But Sam didn’t want to leave things how they were, with this sort of awkward tension between them. He could still feel the tension in Ollie’s shoulders, and he’d seen the darkness that had clouded Ollie’s beautiful deep brown eyes just moments ago.
Sam squeezed Ollie to him a little tighter before releasing him and stepping back. “Ireally look forward to seeing you at lunch,” he said, mustering up a small smile. “I’ll even stop by your mom’s and pick up those almond cookies she said she had for us.”
Ollie seemed ready to protest, but then he just smiled instead. “I’d really like that. If—if you have time. Only if you have time.”
“For you, love, I always have time.” Sam’s smile was genuine this time as he reached out and touched Ollie’s cheek. He leaned in and kissed his boyfriend softly on the lips, then straightened up again. “See you at eleven thirty?”
Ollie nodded. “Yeah.”
They both lingered another few seconds before Ollie finally pulled away and, with a reluctant wave, headed inside the office building. Once the door closed, Sam stuffed his hands in his pockets and turned around to make the short walk back to Ollie’s apartment.
Although Sam had been up for hours already, the rest of the small town seemed to just be waking up. Along his walk, joggers and bicycle riders passed by, usually with a cordial nod or wave, and he always reciprocated. He thought of takinga detour to walk to his favorite coffee shop, but he quickly dismissed the idea.
Coffee wasn’t what he needed right now.
