I patted his shoulder, though I couldn’t hide my smile.
“Shut up! I don’t like you!” he barked. “Yvaine, stop talking to this bug.”
“The feeling’s mutual, grandma slayer.”
I interrupted their volley of insults by jabbing my elbow onto Tiziano’s ribs. “Go feed Zeus, or no more croissants for you.”
He didn’t budge. Apparently, the croissants werenotmotivating enough. I supposed Z would be fasting.
“I heardyouonly slay your hygiene.”
I jumped in again. “Rudy, lemons are healthy! There’s nothing wrong with having a citrus breakfast.” I wasn’t just stalling—I waseducating. “In fact, lemons are packed with vitamin C and soluble fiber that help with weight loss and loweryour risk of heart disease, anemia…basically everything except being irritating on speaker.”
Tiziano had already geared up for the next punch. “So you should drink lemon juice by the bucket! With your toxic karma, I’m sure you’re already halfway to a heart attack, but the most probable issue is brain loss.”
Tiziano really leaned into the wordloss.
Rudolph chuckled, not at all offended. “I forgot all of you nerds are doctors! Know any hot nurses down there?”
“I forgot you’re chauvinistic,” I retorted, brows furrowed.
“Bet he’s got zero girls, Ivy. Who’d want this roach?”
“Ivy doesn’t think I’m a roach. And she needs me. Her friends are all stiff freaks.”
Glancing at the phone with that too-sweetsmile, completely changing the subject, Tiziano cooed, “What time is your date tonight, Yvaine?”
I rolled my eyes, understanding what he was doing. “Tizzy, Rudy and I are just friends. He dates girls. Or, at least, he hangs out with them.”
The voice that came from the phone was quieter. Just a little different. “You have a date?”
“He’s my non-mate with benefits,” I said, avoiding Tiziano’s smug face.
“Several benefits.” He poked my ribs. “And he’s ourtutor. Anatomy lessons are their thing, roach.”
“Tutor?”
Is Rudolph just repeating things now?
“Yeah, you know.” Tiziano was gleaming now. “Intelligent, hot, academically threatening? Plays defense on the wereball team and knows what a shower is. And you,Rudy? Even make the second team? Or are you just a benchwarmer?”
“Oh really? And where was this academically threatening hero last time when we kicked the Comets’ balls back to space?”
Here we go again. Was there anything that could dent Lucien even in the slightest?
“Hewas there, and he played well. Tizzy, Zeus is waiting,” I cut in.
Tiziano just continued, “And if thatMasturbatorhadn’t played like the cheating troll he is, we would have crushed you. Plus, Sillas, the hero’s name, blocked your quarterback’s cheating butt three times.Three!”
There was a pause. A long one. For a second, I thoughtmaybeLucien was hurt. Or offended.
“Ahh, sore losers are the loudest.Tizzy,own the ass-kicking, even if we made you eunuchs.”
I thought wrong.
Tiziano’s entire posture shifted. Imaginary steam curled out of his red ears.
“Okay! Enough, you two. You, go sit in the living room if you want a cappuccino!”
