I cross my ankle over the opposite knee and feel the groove between my big toe and the next.
The spots already raised.
My eyes water.
Emmett will never know.
Honey eyes flash in my head. Blond hair. Little gasps and the warmth of his touch on my leg.
He’ll never have to know I’m a liar.
My grip on the needle tightens when my fingers shake too much.
There’s a bead of sweat that’s rolling down my back, raising goosebumps along its path. A thickness in my throat that I can’t swallow back.
You promised.
That thickness becomes a dry sob, my chest too tight to drag in a full breath.
Emmett will know.
Maybe he found the kit last night while he was alone—
Fuck, he was alone all night.
I’m practically vibrating, caught up in a spiral of dark thoughts of what he could have done all night. What I might find when I venture farther into the house.
He was fine when we left.
He was fine.
He wasfine.
Forcing a choppy breath, I miss capping the needle three times before the click sounds.
It’s like a boulder crashing in the night, accompanied by the sound of my pumping chest and the hiss of the closing zipper. It gets caught, refusing to close the last few teeth together.
Just use it.
The thing inside my chest clenches tighter as I pull back the zipper and try again.
“He was okay,” I whisper to the nothingness around me. “Fine.”
I get to the part where it sticks and jerk, jamming the metal over itself and catching my finger in the process. I hiss and toss the kit back where I found it. Clamor around putting the glass bottle of aftershave back in front of it.
Stepping back, I stare at it.
It’s clear that it’s back there. Barely hidden. Sticking out and visible through the glass.
I’m such a liar.
With a curse, I swipe at my brow and slam the cabinet closed.
My reflection stares back at me in the dark and it’s bad enough that I almost dig the pouch back out.
Chapter 30
Emmett
