“Fine, fine, please, just leave them alone.”
I nod at my guards as I step back, but I’m not satisfied. Lifting my gun, I shoot both of his legs without looking. “A physical reminder, in case you forget,” I tell him as I put my gun away and walk toward Yuki.
His face is expressionless, but his gaze is not. He looks sad—sad it’s come to this, that I’m having to get my hands dirty.
“Sir.” Yuki offers me a handkerchief. I ignore it and walk toward the car. The blood dries on my skin, staining it. Let the world see what I’m willing to do to those who stand against me. When I don’t speak,he sighs. “It isn’t anyone we recognize, but that doesn’t mean anything. I will put out feelers and find out if they are hired killers. I will give you names as soon as possible.”
“Good,” I murmur as I slide into the car. “Is Nikko okay?”
“It seems they are leaving him alone or hiding. Word has traveled that you are angry and searching for those behind the attack. They could simply be lying low, but we’ll keep the protection detail on him from a distance so he doesn’t suspect anything.”
I nod, happy about that. I can’t be who I need to be if I’m worried about Nikko.
The idea of him seeing me now horrifies me. He would be disgusted, but I don’t care. I’ll keep him alive no matter what.
“He looks . . . tired,” Yuki remarks, and I whirl around. “He isn’t sleeping. He’s in the gym all day and night practicing, barely eating or going out.”
“As long as he’s alive, he can get over anything.”
“What if he doesn’t get over you?” Yuki murmurs. “What if you go too far this time, sir?” My eyes meet his, and he purses his lips. “You aren’t like this. You use other tactics to get what you want. When everyone else goes low, you stay true. You defeat them with money, power, and intelligence. You never get your hands bloody. You let them ruin themselves.”
“They tried to kill him, Yuki,” I argue.
“I know,” he murmurs. “But can you really live with what you are becoming? Could your father? Could Nikko? I will be with you no matter what, but they wanted more for you. We will find who did this, and we will make them pay, but not this way. Let’s show them what true power is. Let’s not give them anywhere to hide.”
“I can’t lose him,” I admit, and Yuki sighs.
“I know, sir, but you can’t lose yourself either. You have worked so hard to be who you are now. Don’t let them ruin that or they win. Let me dirty my hands for you, not the other way around. We will win, sir, I will ensure it, but the right way—a way you can live with.” I stare into his pleading eyes, and I know he’s right. I don’t want to be a killer. I never did. I just want my family safe.
“Okay,” I concede, and he blows out a breath of relief. “You’re right, we’ve gotten this far my way, so let’s not revert back to my father’s. I’ll defeat them the same way I have conquered everyone else who has stood in my way. I just . . . lost myself for a moment.”
“Everyone does.” He hands me wipes. “But it’s time to come back. We need you. Your father needs you. Nikko needs you.”
I startle at his name, a reminder of what I left behind. I’ve tried my best to forget him, to stay busy so I don’t remember the way he held me in his sleep, as if he were afraid I would disappear on him. I promised nothing but sex, but I still think about him.
I look at the bracelet around my wrist and my heart aches.
TWENTY-SEVEN
Ifeel the wary stares, the eyes tracking my movements as I hammer the bag. Sweat pours down my body since I have been at it for hours, and every inch of me aches from the insane training schedule I have been keeping, but it’s the only time I can’t think. When I’m alone, thoughts of him consume me, and my bed still smells like him.
He completely disappeared. I showed up at his house, but I was turned away. I tried to call his business and was rejected. He’s blocked me from his life like I was nothing.
It pisses me off, but it also hurts a lot.
Was I so easy to walk away from? We didn’t make any promises, and he emphatically told me over and over again how this could only be about sex, but we both know it wasn’t. There was more between us. Fuck buddies don’t kiss the way we did. They don’t hold each other or go on dates.
No, it was more, and he left.
I know why. I’m not stupid. The attack spooked him. While I was worried about how I could protect him in the future, he was letting me go so it would never happen again. He told me about his life, about how it isn’t safe and I was better off without him. Zia also mentionedthat he was afraid his world would taint mine, and the first moment it did, he left so I wouldn’t become a target.
If this were just about sex, then he wouldn’t care like that. Zia wouldn’t leave to keep me safe, and that fucks me up inside. He cares more than he wants to admit. It’s why he walked away. It’s why he cut all ties.
If he thought I would make it that easy, then he doesn’t know me very well. I never give up. I never stop coming. There is a reason I’ve never lost a fight, and I’m not about to start now. It just so happens that this one is the most important of all—for his heart.
“Nikko, enough,” my father snaps as he grabs the bag to stop it from swinging. “Boy, what the fuck is going on? You beat everyone to a pulp, and now all my equipment. I’ll have no boxers or gym left at this rate.”
“Nothing,” I mutter.
