I wonder if he will think of me from time to time like I will of him.
One night is all we had. We are no better than strangers passing on the street, but I’m irrevocably changed by it.
By him.
FIVE
It took all of two hours. The house is mine, and everything is signed over. Yuki is taking care of the security, our team, and getting everything packed and moved. It’s all up to him, and now, the only thing I need to do is tell Faiz.
I go home, even though it’s the last place I want to be. Will I be strong enough to do what I need to do? I can’t melt and give in like usual as soon as I see his eyes. I have to be strong.
I walk inside our shared penthouse and find him sitting in the dining room, a plate of half-eaten food before him as well as his usual hangover cocktail, which he sips through a straw. He doesn’t say anything, but I don’t either as I watch him.
Both of us are in last night’s clothes, yet he doesn’t say a word. He simply runs his eyes over me and continues to drink his cocktail, and that’s when I know this is really over.
I wanted him to fight and get angry . . . anything, but he didn’t because he doesn’t care enough to.
Familiarity, friendship, and betrayal wash over me. All the years we spent together spin around us. It would be so easy to pretend everything is fine and carry on the way we have been, but I’m tired. I want to be happy, even if it hurts.
Despite how early it is, I head to the bar and pour myself a drink, knowing I’ll need it to get through this conversation. “Don’t forget we have that meeting with Zigon Electric today,” he says.
That’s it, nothing else.
No explanation, no demands, just a reminder about business.
When did everything get so twisted between us?
When did he stop loving me?
Was it one year ago? Two?
When did he stop looking at me as his forever. Downing another glass, I try to drown my pain, but it doesn’t work. It’s still there because despite it all, I love him. I don’t know if it’s the same as it used to be, but it’s there. I never gave up on us previously, but I am now. I never thought I’d walk away, but here I am. It will change everything, and it could make our families enemies, but I don’t care.
I can’t compromise myself anymore, not for the sake of making things easier.
“You should shower,” he adds when I don’t respond.
I don’t look at him as I speak, knowing if I do, my resolve will weaken. It’s just the effect he has on me. He’s always made me weak. “Do you even care where I was last night?”
He’s quiet, and I turn around, knowing my eyes swim with tears. I try to blink them away, not wanting that sign of weakness to fall.
“Do you even want to know where I was or what I was doing?”
He sits back, eyeing me, nothing but confusion on his face. “Should I want to know? Will it change anything?”
I stare at the man I love and realize he’s more of a stranger than Nikko is. This isn’t the man I fell in love with. I don’t know when he changed. Maybe it was so gradual I didn’t even notice, but it’s not him.
I stare for a moment before I down my drink. “No, I don’t suppose it will change anything.” I put my glass down carefully, even though I crave the idea of smashing it. That’s childish. “I won’t be at the meeting today.”
It’s an important one that we brokered together, and it benefits us mutually, but it’s negotiated for both of us, not one, and we know it. He must hear something in my tone, though, because he sighs.
“Okay. I will see if we can reschedule?—”
“No. Let’s not reschedule.”
He sits up, his eyes narrowing as he frowns.
“Let’s not do it.”
