“Okay, thank you.”
I lean back in my chair. “You’re welcome.” My voice is full of amusement. “Though I gotta say, this is one helluva way to negotiate.” My eyes rake over her. “Might have to piss you off more often,” I tease.
She glares at me and I chuckle. Shoving a bite of food in her mouth, she rolls her eyes. “You know why I didn’t want to take a risk on this. But the only reason you gave me was your job. Is there anything else I should know about?”
My grip tightens on her hand a fraction before I let it go. I run my fingers over the stubble on my chin. “Yeah, there is.” I’m about to scare her off. “I don’t do things halfway. If this ishappenin’, you need to know I’m all in. And that means when my instincts kick in, it won’t be some cute, charmin’ shit.” My eyes bore into hers. “I will literally kill for you, Seriphina. That’s not a metaphor.” And have. I need to know she understands the depth of what I’m saying. That she can handle the unshakable truth of it.
“Oh, okay. And here I thought you’d say long work hours.” She laughs nervously. But then she frowns and her tone changes. “You mind elaborating on that? You don’t mean you’ll kill someone for grabbing my ass? It’s more of a self-defense thing, right? Like with what happened...” The wheels are working in her head.
“Self-defense? Sure.” I let out a dark chuckle. “But if someone hurts you, if they so much as make you flinch like that night in your shop, then no, it won’t be self-defense. It’ll be me makin’ sure they never think about touchin’ you again.” My tone is light but I’m dead serious. “That what you want to hear?” I’m waiting to see if she bolts.
“I guess so?” She taps her fork against her plate and looks off to the side. “I really meant more about your job and what that would look like with us together. I live and work at my store. But I’ve noticed you don’t really have set hours. So...” She frowns again.
I am taking bites in between pauses in conversation. “I take jobs as I get them. Sometimes there’s a few weeks, months even, without somethin’ comin’ up. Sometimes it’s back-to-back. I have no set time frame or schedule. I travel all over the world. Doesn’t matter where. I’ve been in Africa, then gone the next day for London. Or the Middle East. Then back to France and all the way to Indonesia. It changes.”
“Okay, so we do the long distance thing then?”
The fact that she’s asking questions means she’s serious about giving this a shot. An unfamiliar warmth expands inside my chest, stealing my breath.
“Not if I can help it,” I say firmly. “I don’t leave you behind unprotected. Either you come with me, safely tucked away in a hotel while I handle the job, or I arrange security for you. Jax, Bishop, someone trustworthy.” I continue quietly, “But ideally? You’re with me. Always.”
“I don’t make enough at Moonglow to leave it closed for extended periods of time. And I can’t afford to hire someone.”
She has a wistful gleam in her eye. The look on her face makes me want to pay off every bill she has. She’s bleeding money into her store and the interest rate on the mortgage she took out is swallowing her profits.
“Seriph, you realize I wired you fifteen grand like it was pocket change, right?” I would pay off her bank note if I thought she’d let me. “I’m not sayin’ you have to take my money. But if this is gonna work? Then your store’s security, and yours, becomes my priority too.”
“We aren’t there yet.” She shakes her head.
I make an obscene amount of money off the contracts I take. Hell, I put the money from the cartel for Stepan and Viktor in an account with her name on it. It’s enough to pay her bills for the next three years. I plan to give it to her whether this goes anywhere between us or not. She deserves something after what those bastards did to her.
“Fine,” I reply, conceding for now. “We’ll table it. But we are circlin’ back to that.” We finish eating. And I can’t ignore her state of undress anymore. “After we address the fact that you’re eatin’ spaghetti in pasties like it’s a completely normal Tuesday.”
“It was a completely normal Tuesday until you insulted my dress.” Her fork hits her plate a little too hard at the reminder.
I groan, remembering how poorly I handled this situation when I came in. “Yeah, I was bein’ an ass,” I mutter, looking up at her. “But in my defense that dress was a goddamn distraction. And now?” I make a show of trailing my eyes over her bare skin so I can watch her flush again. “Now you’re playin’ dirty.”
I push back from the table, clearing it before I lose control and have a repeat of the wall incident. I wash the dishes. I hope if I don’t look directly at her, I can push down some of this raging fire in my veins. It works, somewhat, until delicate hands and soft arms wrap around my middle and flatten on my stomach. I suck in a breath and stiffen when the rest of her is pressed up against my back. The plate I’m holding rattles as it hits the bottom of the sink. I turn off the water.
“Seriph.” My voice is strained. I’m holding on by a thread.
“I said I wanted to take the relationship slow. But does that mean we have to wait?” She sounds calm but vulnerable.
I can imagine how hard it is for her to take this step after what happened. The only reason I haven’t fucked her on the table, the floor, and the counter by now is because I’m determined to take this at her pace. I refuse to take from her like they did.
“No.” I white knuckle the edge of the sink. “We don’t have to wait.” I turn around, slowly.
I’d rather carve out my own heart than let this hurt her. The look on her face almost breaks me. Her chin is tilted to the side and her shoulders are set. She wants to beat what was done to her and she wants me to help her do it.
I reach down, grasping the edge of my shirt. I pull it off in one smooth motion, tossing it on the counter. “You tell me to stop, I stop.” My gaze locks to hers. “You tell me to go slower, I go slower.”
She places her palms flat on my chest. “I trust you.”
Her words are like a balm, healing in places I didn’t know were broken. My lips graze the shell of her ear. “Let me show you how much that means to me.”
I scoop her up, one arm under her thighs, the other cradling her back. She squeals and clings to me.
“Not gonna drop you.” I chuckle and hold her closer to my chest, carrying her to the bedroom.
