My grip loosens on the little hands in mine, and I shake my head. “I can’t believe I forgot you’re related to Jonah.”
I really can believe it though, because Jonah and Dane are nothing alike, apart from their very obvious familial features. I expected another star student when I found out Jonah was related to Dane, but I was wrong. My hopes fell dramatically when I realized Jonah was not, in fact, taking my classes to study the magic that is natural science.
Dane leans in for a hug and, though surprised, I release my daughters’ hands and accept. “It’s good to see you again,” he says and steps back. He smells of dog hair and barn, but there’s a whisper of body wash under it all. “You live next door?” he asks.
I shrug. “Looks like it.”
Dane hooks his thumb over his shoulder. “This is our dad, Neal.”
The older man steps forward to shake my hand. It’s firm, but gentle, and his little smile tucks a dimple under his salt and pepper beard. God, do these three look alike. “It’s nice to meet you,” he says. “Sorry it was under duress.”
“Okay, what the heck,” Jonah harrumphs. He settles his palms on his narrow hips. “They get hugs and a handshake and I don’t?”
“We gave you cookies,” I say flatly.
“Did you like them?” Delta asks.
His eyes become saucers. “Did I like them? Do sheep wear sweaters?”
To my horror, both of the girls giggle, Lo’s volume barely registering, and I find myself disarmed at his answer. His—dare I say it—cute answer?
I dare not.
“No,” Delta laughs. “They don’t wear sweaters. They havewool.”
“That’s what I’m saying.” He gestures wildly. “They wear wool sweaters.”
Delta’s about to respond, but hesitates, and hauls me down to her level to whisper in my ear, “Can we make him more cookies?”
My heart cinches at her request because I want to give this to her, the experience of welcoming new people into a community, but it’s Jonah we’re talking about. I’m trying to wipe the man away from my mind, but the damn wiper blades are frozen to the windshield.
I will not do another relationship again—not one with feelings at least. I cannot afford to lose myself and safety. And I’m certainly not about to start something sexual with him. I don’t allow myself feeling for the submissives I fuck, and I make sure they don’t have them for me. Why would I risk adding a sexual component with my new neighbor? That’s a recipe for disaster if either of us caught feelings.
I don’t have an answer for my daughter because I don’t have an answer for myself. So I simply whisper back, “We’ll talk about it.”
Before I’m even standing all the way up, Jonah hands over the horse reins to his dad, then crowds me. His face has lost all its levity, and the only time I’ve ever seen it look so serious was when he was between my—no. I’m not going there.
“I promise this won’t happen again,” he says, his voice a little lower, a little softer. “With the girls, that is.”
“You can’t exactly prevent them from coming over.”
“No,” he says, and pulls at the back of his neck. “But, I’ll send them back. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
A flicker of warmth ignites in my chest, but I keep my expression neutral.
“Girls, why don’t you ask Dane over there what horses like to do for fun?” I ask, because I need them to clear outfor a second so I can address Jonah.
They scamper five feet away, on the other side of the mare, before I nod to him swiftly. “I would appreciate that.”
His serious expression evaporates when the moment stretches, and a deep smile forms on his face. “You know... you could give me your number.”
“Um, no.”
“Why not? What if the girls are over here playing with the ducks and I want to warn you? Or what if you forgot to close your garage door and need me to run over and close it while you’re out?”
He makes infuriatingly good points. I really don’t want to give him my number because that is a dangerous hill to fall down. The temptation to text him or read his would be too great, too toe-curling.
Yet, for some unspeakable reason, I find myself nodding. “Fine.”
